The Jedburgh Podcast #172: The Message No One Wants To Give...or Receive - Major General Gil Ferguson & Gold Star Daughter Dalia Munoz
Memorial Day isn’t about a long weekend and BBQs. It’s about honoring those who gave their lives in defense of America…and it’s about supporting the families they left behind. Across US Army Special Operations Command remembering the legacy and impact of the fallen is a daily duty.
This Memorial Day, Fran Racioppi sat down with Major General Gil Ferguson and Dalia Munoz to share the story of the day that changed, and intertwined, their lives forever. The day SFC Pedro Munoz, Dalia’s dad, was killed in action. General Ferguson was the officer charged with informing her and her family of his death. Delivering a message no one wants to receive and no one wants to give. Dalia, her mother and her grandmother have never been the same.
In this emotional tribute, Dalia and General Ferguson recount that grief-stricken January morning; the planning and preparation behind the casualty affairs process; and the shock, disbelief and sadness that suddenly overcomes a family.
Regulation says the casualty officer and the family shall never meet again; which was the case until General Ferguson became the USASOC Chief of Staff, a role that put him in charge of the Protocol office, the office in which Dalia worked. Confronted with the biggest leadership challenge of his career, General Ferguson had to decide if, and how, to tell Dalia about their encounter years earlier.
This episode is about service. It’s about leadership when it matters most. And it’s about what it means to live a life shaped by loss, and still find purpose on the other side. It’s raw, it’s real, and it’s one to never forget.
Special thanks to General Ferguson and Dalia for their openness and willingness to share the rare bond they hold. Thanks to the USASOC Historian’s office for hosting us.
HIGHLIGHTS
- 0:00 Introduction
- 2:02 Welcome to USASOC
- 4:01 The Importance of Memorial Day
- 7:26 January 1st, 2005
- 11:31 Constructing a plan
- 28:25 SFC Pedro Munoz
- 32:30 Navigating Grief
- 35:45 Dealing with loss of a Green Beret
- 40:45 Reconnecting
- 52:31 Gold Star Families
- 56:25 Remaining a part of the Regiment
- 59:59 Resources for Mental Health
- 1:02:50 Memorial Day Message
Quotes
- “Memorial Day is an opportunity for us to stop, honor the fallen and take a moment to remember.”
- “It takes a deliberate effort to remember folks once there’s no one else in the formation who personally knew them.”
- “The Army does such a good job of preparing people for what they tell you is going to be a task for which it is impossible to actually really prepare.”
- “You don’t want somebody who’s an early riser waking up and turning on the news and finding out there’s a casualty, and then the next thing you know there’s people calling around and speculation.”
- “That’s the system. You deliver the message as the notification officer and then get off the X.”
- “Doesn’t matter how much you prepare, you’re not prepared.”
- “Everything you think you’ve known is completely shattered.”
- “You kind of only get one shot at things that you’re doing and so you have to do them well.”
- “The leadership has to be able to understand how to give the formation the room and the space to grieve, but also how to channel that grief into the next step, which is the requirement to potentially go out the door the next day.”
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