Our Dead Dads How to Comfort the Bereaved: Grief Support, Healing, and Empathy with Mark Lucero - Episode 20
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WHO THIS EPISODE HELPS
This episode helps anyone struggling to support a grieving friend, loved one, or community member, and those seeking clarity on grief, mourning, and loss.
WHAT LISTENERS WILL GET
Listeners will gain practical tools to comfort the bereaved, insight into the six needs of mourners, and guidance on what not to say during grief.
DESCRIPTION:
In this episode, host Nick Gaylord welcomes grief counselor and author Mark Lucero to discuss how to better support loved ones in grief. Together they explore the difference between grief and mourning, the dangers of carried grief, and the misconceptions that keep many from healing. Mark shares the “golden rule” of grief support and offers tangible ways to show up for someone in pain. He also explains the six needs of every mourner and why food, presence, and listening matter more than platitudes. Nick adds his own reflections on complicated grief, therapy, and why building community is essential for healing. This conversation offers both practical strategies and deep compassion for anyone touched by loss.
This episode answers:
- What is the difference between grief and mourning?
- What should you never say to someone who is grieving?
- How can you best support a friend after a loss?
- What are the six needs of every mourner?
- Why is carried grief harmful, and how can it be addressed?
Key Takeaways:
- Grief is an internal experience; mourning is the outward expression that heals.
- Avoid phrases like “everything happens for a reason” or “at least…”—they harm more than help.
- Supporting grief requires proactive action: showing up, bringing food, and initiating contact.
- The six needs of mourners include acknowledgment, feeling pain, remembering, identity, meaning, and long-term support.
- Healing comes through community, conversation, and embracing suffering as part of growth.
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