Reasonably Happy with Paul Ollinger From Chaos to Cambridge - Rob Henderson
18 snips
May 14, 2025 
Rob Henderson, author of 'Troubled: A Memoir of Foster Care, Family, and Social Class', shares his remarkable journey from a turbulent childhood in foster care to earning a PhD at Cambridge. He discusses the impact of instability on his education and emotional health, reflecting on military discipline as a transformative force. The conversation explores his concept of 'luxury beliefs' and how elite values can disadvantage the less privileged. Rob also delves into the importance of belonging, love, and the lessons learned from his past.
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Early Foster Care Isolation
- Rob lived in many foster homes and felt emotional shutdown by age five, becoming numb to constant instability.
- He describes a final foster home where he was isolated and made to do labor like raking leaves and cleaning gutters.
Instability Beats Income Alone
- Foster placements are scarce so homes often pack many unrelated children together, creating competition and instability.
- Henderson argues instability often matters more than poverty itself for long-term outcomes.
Servant Role In One Home
- At one foster home Rob was the only child and the foster mother used boys as unpaid servants rather than providing care.
- He spent his free time cleaning, raking leaves, and doing chores instead of getting nurturing attention.
