The podcast explores the challenges of having too many hobbies and a lack of focus. It delves into the struggle of starting new things but not being able to follow through. The correlation between success and friendships is discussed, as well as the illusion of external validation. The speakers reflect on their new direction in life and the power of love.
30:03
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Quick takeaways
The guest's belief that being successful is necessary for love and acceptance stems from her experience as a lonely child in school and drives her constant search for validation through new projects and hobbies.
The host challenges the guest to let go of the idea of being unlovable and instead embrace herself, love who she is, and prioritize enjoying life and cherishing loved ones without seeking external validation.
Deep dives
The Need for Success and Belonging
The podcast delves into the guest's deep-rooted belief that being successful is the key to being loved and accepted by others. She feels that not being successful makes her unlovable and causes her frustration and anger. This belief stems from her experience as a lonely child in school. Despite being loved by her husband and family, her self-image of being unlovable persists. This idea drives her to constantly start new hobbies but never finish them, hoping that success will bring her friends and validation.
Challenging the False Concept of Success
The host challenges the guest's belief that success is necessary for love and acceptance. He points out that she is already loved and cherished by her husband, daughter, and family. He encourages her to let go of the emotional idea of being unlovable, as it only strengthens the belief. He suggests making a joke about it, embracing herself, and loving the person she is, just as a mother loves her child. The host emphasizes that fighting for success will only reinforce this negative self-image.
Reevaluating the Direction of Life
As the guest grapples with the idea of letting go of the pursuit of success, she realizes that her previous motivation and direction in life were based on a false story. She feels a sense of loss and uncertainty about her new direction. However, she begins to consider focusing on enjoying life, cherishing her loved ones, and finding fulfillment in her passions without seeking external validation. The guest contemplates a simpler and more loving life that prioritizes fun and genuine connections.
Christine (30) finds it hard to focus on anything. She always likes to start new projects and learn new things, but she often quits after a while. She wants to be proud of herself by accomplishing things and being successful but she feels like she never achieves anything. Where does this need for successful come from? Together with Berthold she discovers the deeper layer.
Do you also have a personal problem and would you like to discuss it with Berthold in the podcast? We would love to have you as our guest!Click here for more info and the application form.
This year, the best-selling tear-off calendar in the Netherlands is also available in English for the first time! Order here: www.omdenken.nl/calendar.
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