Dr. Jake Smith, a licensed professional counselor and founder of Plumline Ministries, returns to discuss essential strategies for connected fatherhood. He emphasizes the attunement triangle—a transformative approach to relationships that involves seeing, feeling, and delighting in your kids. Jake highlights the dangers of the 'smothering grind' that leads to burnout for many fathers and challenges conventional behavior modification techniques that inhibit genuine connection. Listeners learn how emotional awareness can foster deeper family ties, guiding fathers away from merely surviving to truly thriving.
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insights INSIGHT
Attunement Is Relationship Glue
Attunement is the central engine of lasting, deeply connected relationships.
It means seeing someone, feeling with them, suffering alongside them, and delighting in them.
insights INSIGHT
70% Of Leaders Don't Finish Well
Research shows 70% of Christian leaders (including dads) don't finish well.
The smothering grind of life is identified as a major systemic cause of that failure.
volunteer_activism ADVICE
Guard Against The Smothering Grind
Watch for three destructive outcomes the smothering grind pushes toward: burnout, flame out, or tap out.
Treat any slide toward these as urgent signs to change course before harm spreads to your family.
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🔥 PART 2 is here! Dr. Jake Smith is back with the game-changing attunement triangle that will transform how you connect with your kids.
70% of Christian leaders don't finish well as dads. Don't be part of that statistic.
In today's episode, you'll discover:
âś… The 4 components of attunement that create lasting relationships
âś… How to escape the "smothering grind" before it destroys your family
âś… Why behavior modification is sabotaging your connection with your kids
âś… The difference between "crushing life" and actually living it
SUMMARY:
The battle for your attention as a dad is real, and 70% of Christian leaders won't finish well. In part two of this critical conversation, Dr. Jake Smith reveals the attunement triangle that creates lasting relationships with your kids and how to escape the smothering grind that leads to burnout, flame out, or tap out. You'll discover why seeing your kids underneath their behavior changes everything and how to move from survival-mode parenting to deeply connected fatherhood.
TAKEAWAYS:
Attunement is the key to all healthy, deeply connected relationships: "I see you, I feel with you, I suffer alongside you, and I delight in you."
The smothering grind pushes 70% of dads toward three outcomes: burnout, flame out, or tap out—and none of them are acceptable.
Stop teaching your kids to survive you and start teaching them to thrive in the world by moving beyond behavior modification.
The attunement triangle consists of attunement at the top, with containment and repair as the foundational supports.
You have two escape routes from life's river: hyperphoria (crushing it through activity) or hypophoria (checking out through apathy)—both lead to destruction.
Your kids need you to stay in the river of life, feeling what's yours to feel and facing what's yours to face.
GUEST:
Dr. Jake Smith is a licensed professional counselor, author, and the founder of Plumline Ministries. He specializes in helping men navigate the challenges of modern fatherhood while maintaining their emotional and spiritual health. Jake has extensive experience in counseling Christian leaders and is passionate about helping dads finish well in their most important relationships.
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