Boundaries for Anxious Folk - Day 28 Break the Anxiety Cycle

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Jun 27, 2024

Anxiety often makes setting boundaries difficult, leading to stress and exhaustion. Boundaries are essential for managing anxiety and depression. Learn how to establish and maintain boundaries effectively to improve mental health.

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INSIGHT

Anxiety and Boundaries

Anxious individuals struggle with boundaries because both setting and not setting them causes anxiety.
Their empathy often leads them to prioritize others' needs, neglecting their own.

ADVICE

Defining Boundaries

Define boundaries not by what others can do, but by what you allow in your life.
Consider your values when establishing these limits.

ADVICE

Clarify and Assess Boundaries

Regularly assess your wants and needs to clarify your boundaries.
Write these down to solidify your understanding and reduce anxiety caused by uncertainty.

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People with anxiety often struggle with boundaries, and that’s partly because setting a boundary makes them anxious and not holding a boundary makes them anxious. And because many people with anxiety are sensitive and empathetic, they’re more likely to sacrifice their own needs and wants than to set boundaries on others. If you tend to be anxious, I bet the thought of setting boundaries makes you cringe a little. Someone with anxiety might say yes to every request at work, they might take on too many tasks, get overwhelmed, and feel stressed and exhausted because they didn’t say no. Relationships require a lot of boundaries, on your space, on your time, on your body and resources. And that’s just normal for healthy relationships, but dealing with toxic people requires even more intense boundary setting. If you want to manage depression or anxiety, you need to set boundaries.

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Therapy in a Nutshell and the information provided by Emma McAdam are solely intended for informational and entertainment purposes and are not a substitute for advice, diagnosis, or treatment regarding medical or mental health conditions. Although Emma McAdam is a licensed marriage and family therapist, the views expressed on this site or any related content should not be taken for medical or psychiatric advice. Always consult your physician before making any decisions related to your physical or mental health. In therapy I use a combination of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Systems Theory, positive psychology, and a bio-psycho-social approach to treating mental illness and other challenges we all face in life. The ideas from my videos are frequently adapted from multiple sources. Many of them come from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, especially the work of Steven Hayes, Jason Luoma, and Russ Harris. The sections on stress and the mind-body connection derive from the work of Stephen Porges (the Polyvagal theory), Peter Levine (Somatic Experiencing) Francine Shapiro (EMDR), and Bessel Van Der Kolk. I also rely heavily on the work of the Arbinger Institute for my overall understanding of our ability to choose our life's direction.

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