What Would You Say to a Wife Whose Husband Has Decided to Live as a Woman?
Jan 31, 2024
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Alan Shlemon, an expert in addressing marital issues involving gender identity, shares advice on what to say to a wife whose husband has decided to live as a woman. The podcast also discusses Christians' responses to attending a wedding where one person is transgender, emphasizing the need for grace. Consistency in treating sexual sin, maintaining gender distinctions, and the dilemma of attending a same-sex wedding are explored. The importance of maintaining relationships with truth and compassion is highlighted, along with promotions of Stand to Reason speakers and upcoming events.
When a spouse decides to live as a different gender, respond in a similar way as if they were engaging in any form of sinful behavior.
Maintaining consistency in treating sexual sin as sin should guide decisions about attending weddings involving same-sex or transgender individuals.
Deep dives
Handling a Challenging Family Situation
The host recalls a previous question about handling a family situation where a parent deconverts from Christianity to atheism, and seeks advice from a colleague. The current question is about how to handle a situation where a person's husband decides to transition to the opposite gender in a marriage, particularly when the wife is a Christian. The host shares a principle he has developed based on previous experiences with friends and family who identify as LGBTQ+. The principle advises considering how one would handle a similar situation if it involved a heterosexual couple engaging in other forms of sexual sin. The response emphasizes the importance of fidelity to one's conscience, biblical values, and ethics, and suggests addressing the situation in a similar way to how one would handle a spouse engaging in any form of sinful behavior.
Understanding the Sinfulness of Transgender Ideation
The host explains that the Bible emphasizes the importance of maintaining distinctions between male and female and commands against cross-dressing in Deuteronomy. The New Testament also warns against same-sex relationships and behavior. The host clarifies that the issue is not about cultural stereotypes of masculinity or femininity, but rather about how individuals identify and believe themselves to be. The sinfulness lies in the act of assuming the identity of the opposite gender through appearance, dress, or behavior. The host encourages listeners to avoid adopting cultural stereotypes and instead focus on what the Bible teaches about gender and sexuality.
Applying the Principle of Consistency
The host applies the previously mentioned principle of consistency to attending same-sex weddings or weddings involving transgender individuals. The main point is that attending a wedding is to participate in celebrating what is occurring at the event. Following the principle, the host advises declining an invitation to a wedding that presents itself as a man marrying another man, even if one individual is transgender. The same principle of consistency applies in situations where heterosexual individuals engage in sexual sin. Although certain details might vary, the response aims to maintain consistency in treating sexual sin as sin and making decisions accordingly.
Responding with Truth and Compassion
The host addresses the controversy surrounding the advice given by another Christian speaker regarding attending same-sex weddings. While he disagrees with the advice, he reminds listeners that offering poor counsel doesn't make someone a bad person. Criticism should not lead to labeling a person as a wolf or demanding repentance. Instead, Christians should continue to show love, recognize that not everyone will agree on every issue, and emphasize truth and compassion in interactions with others, especially those with whom they disagree.
Greg talks to Alan Shlemon about what one should say to a wife whose husband has decided to live as a woman, then he offers some thoughts on how Christians are responding to Alistair Begg’s advice about attending a wedding where one person is transgender.
Topics:
Interview: Alan Shlemon on what one should say to a wife whose husband has decided to live as a woman (00:00)
Commentary: Grace is the antidote to cancel culture (thoughts on how Christians are responding to Alistair Begg’s advice about attending a wedding where one person is transgender). (42:00)