#466 Fantasies, Oral, and More: Sex Tips Galore with Dr. Aly

Dec 30, 2025

This week features Dr. Allison Ash, a trauma-informed intimacy coach and Stanford lecturer, known for her innovative workshops on sexual education. She dives into the world of fantasies, discussing how they differ from actual desires and exploring their mental liberation. Dr. Ash also shares practical tips for effective oral sex techniques, anatomy insights, and the importance of communication in intimacy. Plus, she offers advice on navigating jealousy in non-monogamous relationships, encouraging open dialogues about desires and boundaries.

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INSIGHT

Fantasies Can Reclaim Power Over Past Hurt

Many fantasies reconstruct past challenges to regain control and heal old wounds.
BDSM or forced-pleasure fantasies can let someone reenvision trauma in a controlled, stoppable way.

ADVICE

Warm Up The Brain Before Oral

Start oral sex by turning on the brain and warming the whole body before touching the pussy.
Use varied tongue/finger sensations because the clitoris extends internally and responds to many inputs.

ADVICE

Know Vulva Anatomy To Improve Pleasure

Learn basic vulva anatomy: vulva (external), vagina (internal), and that the clitoris extends deep and wraps around the vaginal canal.
Use this knowledge to target external and internal pleasure zones and explain needs clearly.

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