listening SUPERPOWER podcast Cultivating Active #Listening "Silence" to Become a Better #Leader with Lori Joubert
Have you ever paid attention to the assumptions we have in our conversations with different people? Often when we're listening to another person tell their story, we're listening for the things that we want to hear rather than what the other person is trying to show us at that moment. This bias blocks our listening fully to the other person.
Lori Joubert takes us on a deep dive into the art of listening and how we can listen towards a better world of understanding.
In this episode, Lori talks about her idea of what good listening is, the importance of being heard by people and equally hearing them and their stories. She also speaks about what is at stake if we don't keep moving toward a listening culture. She explains how she practices being present and also shares insights on how you can become part of the solution – how you can practice listening as a powerful tool for people to experience in life.
Lori Joubert is a dedicated coach, facilitator, trainer, and Certified Listening Professional with over 20 years of experience leading and managing groups and individuals with an emphasis on listening. She received her degrees in Speech Communications from the University of Washington.
Since then she has taught, modeled and promoted good listening in several arenas. She has served on the board of the International Listening Association (ILA) in different roles, recently as president. Lori brings a deep desire to serve and a commitment to seeing all sides of every situation. She enjoys bringing people together for the benefit of building healthy and successful relationships. She is naturally curious about people and passionate about listening as an essential human activity.
Her big vision is to really sustain people's connection through listening and continue to build listening more through genuine and meaningful relationships. She believes that by being part of a community that wholeheartedly believes that listening has a meaningful and powerful place in organizations and in our life, she's able to live life better and be of help to others.
"Silence is not inactive; it's actually active. There is a lot going on within the silence that we underestimate all the time...a lot of good listening is happening in moments of silence." – Lori Joubert
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Valuable Resource:
- Kate Murphy's "You're Not Listening: Here's What You're Missing and Why It Matters"
- International Listening Association (ILA)
Listen IN Notes:
0:41 – Lori Joubert and her role in the International Listening Association: its mission and her vision.
02:06 – The memory where she truly realized the power of listening: a casual conversation with a friend who appeared to be genuinely listening and curious about what she was saying.
04:13 – How Lori has been influential with listening and a book that has been influencing her at the moment.
07:43 – Awareness about checking assumptions when talking with people.
11:34 – The healthcare setting and the respectful listening that happens; Having people specifically ask for listening.
14:13 – The strategy she uses to help her listen in a way that is supportive: being relaxed and open.
18:40 – Lori and her work with research and writing: how listening is taught in large complex organizations.
22:50 – What is her version of what good listening means and the presence of good listening in silence.
28:37 – How to make sure your voice is heard even when you're under pressure.
31:00 – Listening and the cultural norms: the organizational structure and training for listening.
37:58 – Her new realizations and thoughts after answering the questions in this episode.
39:05 – What Lori already knows on how she can help: being available for people and sharing her resources.
Key Takeaways:
"Oftentimes, when we're listening to another person tell their story, we're listening for the things that we want to hear, rather than listening for what the other person is trying to show us at that moment; and that blocks listening." – Lori Joubert
"If you walk into a conversation with some sort of notion already of how you think that conversation's gonna go, you've already stopped listening." – Lori Joubert
"Learning one's culture is significant to listening. It helps you adapt and become a better listener." – Lori Joubert
"Don't give up. If you've gotta handle on something that's working in the way you listen, or you see others are listening, or the way you see listening is being taught in your organization, stick with it, carry on, and keep looking at how to make it grow." – Lori Joubert
Notes/Mentions:
- Kate Murphy's "You're Not Listening: Here's What You're Missing and Why It Matters"
- International Listening Association (ILA)
Connect with Lori Jubert:
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- www.listeningalchemy.com
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- contact@listeningalchemy.com