ADHD Crash Course Ep 116. ADHD & Shame: Why Shame Stops You & What to Do About It
Oct 8, 2025
Explore how shame can sabotage progress for those with ADHD. Discover how it undermines problem-solving and replaces curiosity with avoidance. Learn the importance of asking 'how' instead of 'why' to uncover solutions. Brene Brown's insights highlight that connection and authenticity can banish shame's power. Embrace self-compassion and community support to break free from harmful narratives. This thought-provoking discussion reveals that shame is just a story, while curiosity opens doors to possibility.
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Shame Blocks Problem Solving
- Shame shuts down problem-solving by triggering avoidance and threat responses.
- Curiosity opens space for learning and solutions instead of hiding from problems.
Planner Example Shows Root Causes
- Danae uses checking a planner example to show how shame versus curiosity plays out in coaching.
- Different specific reasons (forgot, overwhelmed, too many planners) suggest different solutions.
Ask How, Not Why
- Ask how something didn't happen instead of why to reduce defensiveness and discover concrete barriers.
- Explore the environment, task, and feelings to identify actionable solutions.