Pick-Up Artists, Seduction & Masculine Intimacy (with Dr. Rachel O'Neill)
Sep 19, 2023
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Dr. Rachel O'Neill, expert in mediated intimacy, masculinity, and the perils of the seduction industry, discusses the importance of masculinity studies within gender studies. They explore the financial aspects and mindset of the pick-up artist industry, as well as attraction, control, and contradictions in relationships. They also navigate expectations and assumptions in sexuality research and discuss intersectionality in the pick-up artist community. The podcast concludes by exploring accumulation versus experience in relationships and critiquing gender stereotypes.
The podcast highlights the underrepresentation of masculinity studies within the broader field of gender studies, emphasizing the need for attention to men and masculinity.
The seduction industry devalues quality and humanizes sexual encounters, commodifying sex as a means of validating masculinity.
Intersectional dynamics within the seduction industry, particularly for minority men, highlight the challenges and complexities of race, ethnicity, and cultural knowledge.
Deep dives
Lack of Focus on Masculinity Studies
The podcast discusses the underrepresentation of masculinity studies within the broader field of gender studies. It emphasizes the need to give attention and importance to the study of men and masculinity, as it is often overlooked in favor of examining women and femininity. This lack of focus hinders our understanding of the ways in which men's lives are shaped by social and cultural forces, and how they navigate gender norms and expectations.
The Seduction Industry and the Commodification of Sex
The podcast explores the seduction industry and its impact on men's views of masculinity, sexuality, and intimacy. It delves into the notion that sex can be seen as a currency in these communities, where men engage in tactics and techniques to gain power and control over women. The industry promotes a focus on accumulating sexual experience and skill, often disregarding the quality of sexual encounters and dehumanizing women in the process. This commodification of sex reflects a neoliberal perspective of intimacy, where men seek to accumulate sexual capital as a means of validating their masculinity.
Intersectionality and Experiences of Minority Men
The podcast addresses the intersectional dynamics within the seduction industry, particularly focusing on the experiences of minority men. It highlights how race and ethnicity play a role in shaping men's experiences, desires, and opportunities within the industry. For South Asian British men, the industry offers a path to gain cultural knowledge and access to male friendships. However, the industry's perpetuation of white trainers as arbiters of knowledge and masculinity creates challenges for minority men, as the prescribed models of masculinity may not align with their experiences and bodies. Additionally, the podcast touches on the intersection of mental health and socioeconomic status, explaining how limited access to resources contributes to men seeking guidance and support in the seduction community.
The Importance of Maximizing Human Capital
In today's society, the need to maximize one's human capital in order to succeed in various areas of life is emphasized. This is driven by a sense of precarity and uncertainty, wherein individuals must work hard on themselves to secure opportunities and achieve success. This logic of accumulation is not limited to economic circumstances but extends to personal development and relationships. The idea that one can attain control and success in areas such as intimacy is promoted, despite the inherent vulnerability and unpredictability of such experiences. The seduction industry, often seen as a community, has a strong commercial aspect with millions of pounds being generated each year through books, courses, and online content.
The Influence of Race and Sexual Racism
Race plays a significant role within the seduction industry, both in terms of the experiences of individuals of different racial backgrounds and the dynamics of desire. Men of color, particularly South Asian men, often face discrimination and feel they have lesser sexual value compared to white men. Within the industry, there is a hierarchical view of masculinity, with black men being seen as the most desirable and white women being idealized. This leads to a problematic devaluation of men of color and reinforces a racialized hierarchy. Additionally, many men of color express a preference for pursuing relationships with white women as a means of achieving societal acceptance. However, this perpetuates a cycle of sexual racism. These complex racial dynamics are often overlooked within the industry.
We discuss mediated intimacy, masculinity and the perils of the seduction industry, You can check out Dr. O'Neill's work here: https://www.amazon.ca/Seduction-Men-Masculinity-Mediated-Intimacy-ebook/dp/B07F52917Y/ref=sr_1_1?crid=486Q75CCLGV2&keywords=seduction+rachel+o%27neill&qid=1695125646&sprefix=seduction+rachel+o%27neill%2Caps%2C117&sr=8-1
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