114 REAIR SUMMER - Gillian Sandstrom: Talking to Strangers
Sep 14, 2023
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Gillian Sandstrom, Senior Lecturer in the Psychology of Kindness, discusses the misconceptions and benefits of talking to strangers. She explores fears and interventions, lasting changes after engaging with strangers, conversation starters, cultural considerations, societal norms, and flexibility of social norms in social interactions.
Talking to strangers can result in more positive outcomes than people anticipate.
Individual differences, such as shyness and anxiety, influence people's fears and comfort levels when talking to strangers.
Deep dives
The Study of Talking to Strangers
Dr. Jillian Sandstrom discusses her research on the reasons why people are hesitant to talk to strangers. She explores the fears and misconceptions people have about initiating conversations with unfamiliar individuals. Through her mini-meta analysis of seven studies, she found that people's fears often do not align with the actual outcomes of talking to strangers. In fact, after engaging in conversations, participants reported that the interactions went better than expected. She also highlights the positive effects of talking to strangers, such as improved mood and increased feelings of connection. While cultural norms and individual differences influence people's willingness to engage with strangers, Sandstrom suggests that repeated positive experiences can help reshape perceptions about the benefits of these interactions.
Factors Influencing Conversations with Strangers
Dr. Jillian Sandstrom discusses the factors that influence people's decisions to talk to strangers. She notes that individual differences, such as shyness and interaction anxiety, play a role in people's fears and uneasiness about initiating conversations. However, she also highlights that even individuals who experience these anxieties can have a genuine curiosity and interest in others. Sandstrom's research shows that extroversion, low neuroticism, and high openness are associated with lower levels of fear and greater enjoyment when talking to strangers. She underscores the importance of turning down the volume on self-doubt and negative thoughts, and instead focusing on genuine connection and being present in the conversation.
The Impact of Talking to Strangers
Dr. Jillian Sandstrom discusses the impact of conversations with strangers on well-being and social connection. She highlights previous research that suggests talking to strangers can improve mood and foster a greater sense of connection. Sandstrom shares personal experiences and anecdotes to illustrate how these brief interactions can have a positive influence on individuals' lives. She emphasizes that while the fear of rejection and awkward silences may deter people, taking the initiative to talk to strangers can create meaningful and memorable experiences. Sandstrom urges listeners to consider the benefits for themselves, the person they talk to, and society as a whole, by promoting a more open and connected world through these simple interactions.
The Future of Research on Talking to Strangers
Dr. Jillian Sandstrom discusses future directions for research on conversing with strangers. She highlights the need to further examine the impact of age and generational differences on people's fears and perceptions. Additionally, Sandstrom shares ongoing work to explore the similarities between fears of talking to strangers and fears of conversing with acquaintances during challenging situations, such as a cancer diagnosis. She emphasizes the importance of understanding how individuals' concerns and abilities vary across different social contexts. Sandstrom also emphasizes the potential to modify norms surrounding conversations with strangers and acquaintances to create a more positive and open social environment.
Welcome to Week 8 aka the LAST WEEK of our REAIR SUMMER! From this week till September 21st, we will be revisiting some of our favorite episodes around topics related to personal development and self-improvement!
Kate chats with Gillian Sandstrom, a Senior Lecturer in the Psychology of Kindness at the University of Sussex and the Director of the Sussex Centre for Research on Kindness. Gillian’s work focuses on the benefits of minimal social interactions with “weak ties” and strangers, and the barriers that prevent people from connecting with others. In this episode, Gillian tells Kate about the misconceptions that prevent people from talking to strangers and the surprising benefits that can come from engaging in fleeting interactions with strangers, even if we will never see them again.
Check out Gillian’s paper, Why do people avoid talking to strangers? A mini meta-analysis of predicted fears and actual experiences talking to a stranger, which received an Honorable Mention in the Journal of Self and Identity’s 2021 Best Paper Award, here.
You can learn more about Gillian’s exciting research on her website: gilliansandstrom.com. You can also connect with her directly on Twitter @GillianSocial.
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