Beyond the Masks: How Communal Living Changed Our Family

Sometimes the most profound transformations happen when we slow down and settle into community. After months of rapid travel through Italy's Via Francigena, our family landed in Portugal's Algarve region for what became a two-month immersion in communal living that would reshape our approach to family life.

The adjustment wasn't without challenges. Our children, suddenly surrounded by friends who spoke their language, resisted leaving the property to explore. Rather than forcing our travel agenda, we learned to adapt—allowing them the social connections they craved while finding balance in our family rhythm. What emerged was a beautiful dance of independence and connection that none of us expected.

Through living alongside another large family with intentional systems, we witnessed the power of positive modeling. Our children began making their own meals, embracing daily exercise, eliminating processed sugar, and taking responsibility without constant reminders. The stubborn resistance to chores melted away as they saw peers their age enthusiastically contributing to household maintenance. Our nine-year-old son, inspired by the reading culture, independently discovered personal development books that "blew his mind wide open"—learning concepts at nine that many adults don't encounter until decades later.

Perhaps most powerful was watching our sons find mentors beyond us. As parents, we often believe we must be everything to our children, but this experience taught us the value of expanding their circle of positive influence. Seeing our son admire and emulate another father figure wasn't threatening—it was beautiful validation that surrounding our children with diverse, healthy role models helps them flourish in ways we alone cannot facilitate.

The community we built during those months proved invaluable beyond Portugal. When we later faced the devastating loss of our toddler son Liam, these families rallied around us with profound support—a testament to the deep connections formed through intentional community living. Through grief and growth, these relationships continue to nourish us, reminding us that the journey of becoming is best walked together.

Join us as we explore how slowing down and embracing community changed our family forever. What unexpected lessons might emerge when you pause your agenda and allow life to unfold in community?