Kern Beare, founder of The Difficult Conversations Project, talks about getting past surface differences to find our common humanity. They discuss healing relationships, addressing the pandemic, and the potential unity it can bring. They also highlight the need to shift perspectives and ask the right questions for building a better society. Recognizing our shared humanity and choosing love over fear is emphasized using the Tale of Two Wolves metaphor.
Building relationships and engaging in difficult conversations is essential to bridge divides and find common humanity.
Fear and short-term thinking hinder our ability to connect and solve long-term challenges; shifting towards a long-term perspective and focusing on building community is crucial.
Deep dives
Building Connection through Courageous Conversations
This episode of the podcast explores the importance of getting past surface differences to find common humanity. The host acknowledges the challenging times we are living in due to the pandemic and discusses the political polarization and misinformation surrounding it. The key insight is that fear and short-term thinking hinder our ability to connect and solve long-term challenges. The episode emphasizes the need to build relationships and engage in difficult conversations to bridge divides. It highlights the power of sharing personal stories and finding shared experiences to foster understanding and connection.
Shifting from Short-Term Thinking to a Long-Term Perspective
This segment delves into the detrimental effects of short-term thinking in society and the need to shift towards a long-term perspective. It highlights how fear promotes a survival mindset that impedes relationship building and cooperation. The episode emphasizes the importance of asking the right questions to address challenges and foster connection. It proposes that focusing on building community and fostering relationships based on our common humanity is key to overcoming short-term thinking and addressing long-term issues.
Moving Beyond 'There's No Point in Talking to Them'
This segment addresses the common phrase 'There's no point in talking to them' when referring to people with whom we strongly disagree. It highlights the need to shift from the goal of changing someone's mind to focusing on relationship building. The episode emphasizes that the purpose of difficult conversations is not to change others' opinions, but to foster connection and understanding. By recognizing our shared humanity and engaging in conversations aimed at building relationships, we can overcome divisions and promote constructive dialogue.
The Power of Sharing Personal Stories
This episode explores the transformative power of sharing personal stories. It highlights an exercise where participants share their life stories with each other and build deep connections. The story of a young woman connecting with an older man, despite their political differences, demonstrates the importance of understanding each other's experiences. By sharing personal stories, people can move past surface differences and build meaningful relationships based on empathy and compassion.
It’s a phrase I’ve heard over and over these past few years: there’s no point in trying to talk to them. Them is always the person with whom we have strong disagreements, or it might represent an entire group of people we’ve decided are unreachable. But there is a point; it’s just not what you might think. Our question this episode: how can we get past our surface differences to find our common humanity?
My guest is Kern Beare, founder of The Difficult Conversations Project. More information at howcanisaythis.com.
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