The Anxiety Coaches Podcast 1196: OCD, Anxiety And Boundaries: From Approval-Seeking To Authentic Living
In today's episode, Gina shares some important tools to help liberate anxiety sufferers from the limitations placed on them by people-pleasing behaviors. The ability and willingness to use the statement "no", when it is the path to necessary self-care can really help people with anxiety provide themselves with the necessary time, attention and rest to maintain their health and well-being, physically, emotionally and mentally. Listen in and learn how to stop prioritizing others when it is costing you so much.
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Quote:
Boundaries are the distance at which I can love you and me simultaneously.
-Prentis Hemphill
Chapters
0:26 Introduction to Anxiety and OCD
2:10 The Silent Trap of People-Pleasing
7:16 Breaking the People-Pleasing Cycle
10:38 Rerouting Self-Worth
13:15 Reclaiming Your "No"
16:11 Communication Techniques for Boundaries
17:43 Building Long-Term Resilience
Summary
In this episode of the Anxiety Coaches Podcast, I delve into the intersection of anxiety, OCD, and the pervasive habit of people-pleasing. My goal is to provide compassionate insights and practical tools for anyone striving to reclaim their sense of self while moving beyond anxiety. I begin by unpacking the nuances of obsessive-compulsive behaviors, emphasizing that my focus here is on the actions stemming from these patterns rather than diagnostic labels.
We explore a common scenario faced by many: the inability to say "no" when deep down, one knows they should, often dictated by a fear of rejection or conflict. Many of us carry the weight of childhood patterns that inform our present behaviors, and for some, this manifests as a compulsive need to placate others, driven by the overwhelming anxiety that something terrible might occur if we don't meet others' expectations.
As I navigate the complexities of how OCD fuels extreme forms of people-pleasing, I introduce key concepts such as "the silent trap" of anxiety. This is not merely about the stereotypical traits often associated with OCD, such as cleanliness; it's about the underlying fear and uncertainty that can compel individuals into a cycle of people-pleasing as a misguided attempt to ensure safety and avoid conflict. I share a poignant example from a client who, despite feeling unwell, felt an overwhelming compulsion to agree to a request, driven by their fear of being perceived as selfish or unkind.
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