Big Think Money ruins relationships. Here’s how to fix that. | Your Brain on Money
Oct 16, 2025
Money can create tension in relationships, often leading to divorce, especially among young couples. Fear of judgment and control are common barriers to discussing finances. Regular, calm conversations about money can help align couples’ goals. It's important to avoid discussing finances only during crises to prevent negative cycles. Respectful communication and understanding each other's financial backgrounds can foster intimacy. Reframing budgets as spending plans shifts focus to shared values and future aspirations.
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Money Triggers Deep Relationship Pain
- Money conflicts are a leading cause of early marital dissatisfaction and divorce.
- Threats to relationships activate brain regions that register pain, making money talk feel risky.
Turn Conflict Into Opportunity
- Engage in money conversations even when uncomfortable because conflicts are opportunities to improve.
- Use vulnerable tone and posture, avoid one-up positions, and listen to your partner.
Talk About Money Before Crises
- Don’t only talk about money during crises; schedule regular, calm conversations.
- Prepare by asking if you want a successful, happy relationship and then approach money with care.