Why His Darkest SECRET Saved His Life ft. Steven Shields
Oct 28, 2024
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Steven Shields, a counselor and recovery coach, shares his inspiring journey from being a church leader struggling with sexual addiction to founding the non-profit Accepted and Unashamed Unafraid. He discusses the importance of community support in recovery, emphasizing that transformation can happen without hitting rock bottom. Shields breaks the stigma surrounding men's struggles with shame and sexuality, highlighting the power of storytelling and connection in fostering healing. His mission promotes hope and authenticity, proving recovery is a shared journey.
Steven Shields emphasizes that transformation can begin without hitting rock bottom by embracing hope and community support for recovery.
Shame acts as a significant barrier to personal growth, necessitating acknowledgment and confrontation for meaningful healing and empowerment.
Effective communication skills are essential for fathers to build trust and strengthen connections with their spouses and children over time.
Deep dives
Creating Leaders for Generations
The Dad Edge movement aims to cultivate leaders in families and communities, emphasizing that the fathering example set today will resonate through future generations. By providing support and mentorship, fathers are encouraged to raise children who will benefit from positive role models, paving a way for a brighter future. This proactive approach seeks to foster deeper connections within families, ultimately aiming to improve societal standards and relationships. Changing the narrative for fathers helps ensure that they leave a legacy of integrity, responsibility, and nurturing.
Understanding Self-Sabotage
Self-sabotage is identified as a common behavior that prevents individuals from achieving their goals despite their desire for improvement. The psychology behind this phenomenon reveals that many people retreat to old habits when they begin to inch towards positive change, often due to fear of vulnerability or failure. By discussing personal experiences, individuals can navigate through their self-destructive tendencies and understand the underlying emotions that drive them. This insight allows men to recognize patterns of behavior and begin the process of transformation.
The Role of Shame in Recovery
Shame is highlighted as a significant barrier to personal growth, impacting self-perception and the ability to forge meaningful connections. Unlike guilt, which prompts reflection and change, shame leads individuals to believe they are inherently flawed, inhibiting their willingness to seek help or engage in community. Acknowledging and confronting shame is essential for recovery, as it clears the path for personal healing and empowerment. By fostering a supportive environment, men can overcome their insecurities and move towards a healthier psyche.
Effective Communication in Relationships
Building strong connections with spouses and children requires honing conversational skills and fostering open dialogues. The importance of learning how to engage in meaningful conversations cannot be overstated, as this is crucial for building trust and intimacy in relationships. Techniques for effective communication allow fathers to navigate different age stages and emotional landscapes, helping to bridge gaps and eliminate miscommunication. As men develop these skills, they become more engaging and interesting counterparts, enhancing family dynamics.
The Importance of Community Support
Community support serves as a cornerstone for effective recovery and self-improvement, illustrating that connection fosters strength. Men often underestimate the power of shared experiences and collective growth, which can uplift and inspire them during challenging times. By engaging with others in recovery or personal development groups, individuals can find camaraderie and encouragement to push through their struggles. This shared accountability not only enhances personal resilience but reinforces the message that no one needs to face their battles alone.
Steven Shields is a Counselor (ACMHC), recovery coach, and founder of Accepted and Unashamed Unafraid, a non-profit organization dedicated to helping those recovering from sexual addiction and their families. After beginning his own recovery journey in 2014, he launched a podcast sharing recovery stories and now serves on the executive board of Warrior Heart, hosting retreats for men to reconnect with God and live fully alive.
Today, Steven Shields shares his journey from leading a double life as a church leader struggling with addiction to creating a nonprofit that help others battle pornography and sex addiction. His organization provides judgment-free spaces where individuals can share their stories openly and begin their recovery journey.
Through his work and personal experience, Steven emphasizes that transformation doesn't require hitting rock bottom, but rather embracing hope and community support. His approach focuses on removing shame from the recovery process, allowing individuals to pursue authentic healing while building meaningful connections with others who understand their struggles.