Why is it important for partners to understand the protective instincts in trauma survivors?

The CPTSD recovery apprenticeship introduced by Tanner offers a novel approach to healing for survivors of childhood trauma, integrating the 5 Circuits of Healing Power and five Directional Callings of the CPTSD Wheel of Life. This comprehensive curriclum is designed for those seeking leadership within the CPTSD recovery community, emphasizing the empowerment of individuals to draw on their own wisdom rather than depending on outside experts. Tanner views this apprenticeship as a transformative journey that not only aids in personal healing but also has the potential to influence the trajectory of human evolution. Having experienced the profound impacts of deep healing work, Tanner stresses the significance of rebuilding within intimate partnerships, which often mirror the attachment contexts crucial for recovery. CPTSD Medicine is dedicated to creating a paradigm shift in mental health services, where reclaiming personal wisdom becomes the cornerstone of lasting healing.

Key TakeAways

- The apprenticeship is designed for CPTSD survivors actively recovering from childhood trauma, aiming for permanent healing and leadership roles in the CPTSD recovery community.

- Protective Parts in individuals recovering from trauma are survival instincts deeply intertwined with trauma, making it challenging to unravel them.

- Partners of trauma survivors must navigate and support protective parts, as individuals work towards releasing survival coding and discovering their true selves.

- Recognizing and supporting partners in 'I must' energy is crucial, offering assistance and collaboration to help them feel supported, leading to intimate connections.

- Partners should address the 'I can't' Protective Instinct with compassion, as reacting negatively can plant seeds of disrespect and unworthiness.

- Creating a supportive environment with boundaries and accountability in relationships is essential for partners to engage in healing work and contribute to collective healing energy.

Actionable Insights

- Recognize and support a partner in 'I must' energy by offering assistance and collaboration

- Differentiate between survival instincts and True Selves for healthier relationships

- Address 'I can't' Protective Instinct with compassion to restore dignity and emotional healing

- Create a supportive environment with boundaries and accountability in relationships for healing work

- Provide a safe space for partners to engage in healing work while contributing to collective healing energy

- Navigate and support protective parts in relationships as loved ones work towards unburdening and releasing survival coding

Quotes:

“It’s very hard to change behavior, especially if it was an adaptive strategy or something that you inherited or were socialized to believe is the way from your family of origin.” — Tanner [11:02]

“Working on our partnership directly affects our children as well.” — Tanner [17:29]

“You’re keeping the path clear for your partner to do the healing work, but you’re not doing the work for them. You’re simply keeping everything open and clear so that the work is easier to do.” — Tanner [42:44]

“If you weaponize Parts Work, you are creating an unsafe experience for parts of each other to feel that they can trust to be vulnerable.” — Tanner [45:24]