We kick off FOLLOW UP by checking in on Elon Musk’s personal dumpster fire, where the EU is investigating Grok for deepfake slop while Tesla’s “unsupervised” robotaxis turned out to be supervised by literal chase cars — shocker. At least some of you are getting Siri settlement crumbs in your bank accounts, though you could probably double it betting against Musk’s worthless promises on Polymarket.

Transitioning to IN THE NEWS, Tesla is killing off the Model S and X to build robots while sales crater, proving that mixing hard-right politics with EV sales is a brilliant move for the balance sheet. Meanwhile, the corporate bloodbath continues with massive layoffs at Ubisoft, Vimeo (courtesy of the Bending Spoons buzzsaw), and Amazon, because “removing bureaucracy” is apparently HR-speak for 16,000 families losing their livelihoods. If that’s not enough, Google is settling yet another privacy suit for $135 million, the EU is threatening to weaponize its tech sovereignty against the US, and the Trump administration wants Gemini to write federal regulations—because if there's one thing we want drafting airline safety rules, it's a hallucinating chatbot.

Still IN THE NEWS, Waymo is under federal investigation for passing school buses and hitting children, while South Korea’s new AI laws manage to please absolutely no one. Record labels are suing Anna’s Archive for a cool $13 trillion—roughly three times the GDP of India—and the Winklevoss twins have finally admitted that NFTs are dead by shuttering Nifty Gateway.

We pivot to MEDIA CANDY, where the Patriots and Seahawks are heading to Super Bowl 60, and the Winter Olympics are descending on Milan. We’re doing the math on the Starfleet Academy timeline, celebrating the return of Ted Lasso and Shrinking, and trying to decide if Henry Cavill is the second coming of Timothy Dalton in the Highlander reboot. Plus, Jessica Jones is back in the Daredevil: Born Again trailer, and Colin Farrell’s Sugar is returning to explain that wild noir twist we all totally saw coming.

In APPS & DOODADS, the TikTok Armageddon is upon us as the new US owners break the app and drive everyone to UpScrolled, while Native Instruments enters insolvency, leaving our music-making dreams in restructuring limbo. Apple is dropping AirTag 2 with precision finding for your watch, which is great for finding the keys you lost while doom-scrolling.

We wrap up with THE DARK SIDE WITH DAVE, featuring the new Muppets trailer and Steve Whitmire’s deep thoughts on the state of the felt, plus a look at the artisans in Disneyland Handcrafted. Finally, Looney Tunes finds a new home on Turner Classic Movies, proving that the classics never die—they just move to a cable channel your parents actually watch. Dave finally learns about the Insta360 camera, a countertop dishwasher but no Animal Crackers, and a guide to gas masks and googles... for no particular reason.

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