The Evergetinos: Book Two - Chapter XLII, Part II

The Fathers do not flatter us here. They speak with a severity that at first wounds, then heals, if we allow it. They do not treat resentment as a minor flaw of temperament or a passing emotional reaction. They name it for what it is: a poison that slowly erodes the soul’s capacity to remember God.

Abba Makarios goes straight to the heart of the matter. To remember wrongs is not simply to remember events. It is to allow those events to take up residence within us, to become a lens through which everything is filtered. The tragedy is not primarily that we remain hurt. It is that the remembrance of God grows faint. The mind cannot hold both rancor and divine remembrance at the same time. One displaces the other. When resentment is cherished, prayer becomes difficult, then hollow, then distorted. The heart turns inward and begins to feed on its own injuries.

The Fathers are unsparing here because they know how subtle rancor is. Other sins shock us into repentance. A lie, a fall, a moment of weakness often leaves the soul groaning almost immediately. But rancor settles in quietly. It eats and sleeps with us. It walks beside us like a companion we no longer question. Abba Isaiah and the Elder of the Cells both know this danger. Resentment does not merely coexist with spiritual life; it corrodes it from within, like rust consuming iron. The soul grows hard while imagining itself justified.

And yet, alongside this severity, there is a startling tenderness. The Fathers do not say that healing comes through argument, vindication, or emotional catharsis. They prescribe something far more humbling and far more powerful: prayer for the one who has wounded us. Not a feeling of goodwill, not an internal resolution, but the concrete act of standing before God and interceding. Again and again the teaching is the same. Pray for him. Pray for her. Force yourself if you must. Obey even when the heart resists.

The story of the brother who obeyed the Elder and prayed is quietly miraculous. Nothing dramatic happens. There is no confrontation, no apology demanded, no psychological analysis. Within a week, the anger is gone. Not suppressed. Extinguished. Grace works where the will yields, even reluctantly. The healing is not self-generated. It is given.

The account of the two brothers under persecution reveals just how serious this is. One accepts reconciliation and is strengthened beyond his natural limits. The other clings to ill will and collapses under the same torments. The difference is not courage or endurance. It is love. Grace remains where love remains. When rancor is chosen, protection is withdrawn, not as punishment, but because the soul has closed itself to the very atmosphere in which grace operates.

St. Maximos names the interior mechanism with precision. Distress clings to the memory of the one who harmed us. The image of the person becomes fused with pain. Prayer loosens that bond. When we pray, distress is separated from memory. Slowly, the person is no longer experienced as an enemy but as a suffering human being in need of mercy. Compassion does not excuse the wrong. It dissolves its power.

What is perhaps most astonishing is the Fathers’ confidence that kindness can heal not only the one who was wounded, but the one who wounds. Be kind to the person who harbors resentment against you, St. Maximos says, and you may deliver him from his passion. This is not naïveté. It is spiritual realism. Demons feed on mutual hostility. They lose their dwelling place when humility and gentleness appear. Foxes flee when the ground is no longer hospitable.

St. Ephraim’s image is unforgettable. Rancor drives knowledge from the heart the way smoke drives away bees. The heart was made to gather sweetness. When bitterness fills the air, nothing can remain. Tears, prayer, and the offering of oneself like incense clear the space again.

This teaching is beautiful because it is honest. It does not minimize the pain of insult or harm. It is challenging because it leaves us without excuses. We cannot claim prayer while nursing grudges. We cannot claim suffering for Christ while secretly rejoicing at another’s downfall. The path offered is narrow and costly, but it is also liberating.

Resentment chains us to the past. Kindness loosens the chain. Prayer opens the hand. Grace does the rest.

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Text from chat during the group:

00:04:55 Fr. Charbel Abernethy: Page 332 Section B Hypothesis XLII Volume II

00:11:28 Fr. Charbel Abernethy: Page 332 Section B Hypothesis XLII Volume II

00:11:41 Janine: Yes, thank you Uncle Father!

00:11:57 Fr. Charbel Abernethy: Reacted to "Yes, thank you Uncle..." with 😂

00:30:42 Jerimy Spencer: The way you described sharing bread with a demon reminded me of a passage from The Irish Life of Brigit, and after plates were placed for her at a devout lady’s house she stared intently at the plates, and she was asked what it was, and she said, “I see Satan sitting on the dish in front of me.” And it was a demon of sloth that had been ‘invited in’ for years….

00:38:35 Anthony: Rancid

00:47:13 Anthony: Rocky Balboa probably

00:47:16 Anthony: Paulie

00:47:39 Anthony: Yeah that's a good scene

00:48:40 John ‘Jack’: It’s only when I began to pray for a couple that spread false rumors about me fit years that I received the ability to TRULY forgive them, despite years of “being nice” to them to try to make a mend with them.

00:49:51 John ‘Jack’: It’s very difficult to hate those you actively pray for.

00:50:03 Myles Davidson: Reacted to "It’s very difficult ..." with 👍

00:56:31 John ‘Jack’: Lest we lead another into sin

01:00:54 Myles Davidson: I was unaware of how deeply I resented my father until I began to live with him again a few years ago. It’s taken years of confession, prayer and tears but it’s only been in the last few weeks where that anger and resentment has dissipated like a cloud. There’s no way in a million years I could have shifted it on my own and I consider it a miracle

01:01:24 Jerimy Spencer: Reacted to "I was unaware of how..." with ❤️

01:01:33 Jacqulyn Dudasko: Reacted to "I was unaware of how..." with ❤️

01:02:49 Kate : Myles makes a really good point.  I think sometimes we do not realize the interior resentment that we might be holding on to.

01:05:42 Jessica McHale: I do try to do good to those who try to harm me. It does help to limit resenentment or hate from forming. But I also think we have to exercse a bit of prudence when doing good to those who try to harm us. As a female, I can say there were tmes I knew that the loving thing to do was to walk away and not engage rather than to do good toward someone who tried to harm me.

01:05:55 Jessica McHale: Reacted to "I was unaware of h..." with ❤️

01:13:45 Jerimy Spencer: So in a sense, wiping the dust, breaking any unhealthy attachments that may spring up in the moment or moments of offense?

01:19:14 Janine: Blessed Christmas Father!

01:19:50 Jerimy Spencer: Mele Kalikimaka 😃

01:19:56 Maureen Cunningham: Merry Christmas Thank You  Blessing to all

01:19:58 Jessica McHale: Many prayers for you and everyone here! May the Lord bless you abundantly as we close out Advent!!!!

01:19:58 Rebecca Thérèse: Thank you☺️Happy Christmas everyone🎄

01:20:07 Jennifer Dantchev: Thank you! Merry Christmas everyone!