Post Reports Stressed about the holidays? Carolyn Hax has advice.
Dec 23, 2025
Carolyn Hax, a seasoned advice columnist for The Washington Post, shares her insights on navigating holiday stress. She emphasizes that heightened emotions during this season stem from unrealistic expectations. Hax offers practical advice on balancing family dynamics, like managing a mother who won’t leave the kitchen, supporting spouses over stepchildren, and setting boundaries in relationships. She also provides rapid-fire solutions to holiday dilemmas and reminds listeners to find grounding in challenging moments.
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You Don't Have To Do Anything
- Do not feel obligated to attend or do anything just because others expect it.
- Ask if your choices advance your well-being or just satisfy a "should" that makes you miserable.
Holiday Shoulds Magnify Problems
- The holidays amplify "shoulds" and expectations, making underlying issues worse.
- Ask whether actions serve your joy or simply add stress and expense.
Give Aging Parents A Signature Role
- Coordinate roles with aging parents so they keep meaningful tasks without running the whole show.
- Ask what your parent wants to lead and give them a signature job you can rely on.