True Spiritual Friendship — Br Phap Huu, Sr Hien Nghiem — Plum Village France

from 2022 11 03, Rains Retreat, Lay Day, Talk 7.

How can we embrace our ancestors that we have never met?

This and the below questions were addressed by Brother Phap Huu and Sister True Dedication in this “a-la-carte Dharma Talk”.

* How can we understand our deep suffering from our store consciousness, especially circumstances inherited from our family?
* How do I practice compassion and reconciliation when I’ve decided to cut ties or establish boundaries with family members?
* What is the difference between letting go and giving up?
* What are your experiences while meditating?
* How to keep a balance between attachment and support in spiritual friendships?

Did you know that even zen monks and nuns have boundaries and need to know their own capacities while practicing mindfulness in the sangha? Brother Phap Huu and Sister Hien Nghiem shared their personal experiences on the importance of having spiritual friendships, supporting one another on the path, and that by setting boundaries, we are compassionate to ourselves and love is more accessible for others when we are recharged.

Acknowledging our capacities in our individual practice, we imagine ourselves sitting on a boat peeking at our suffering. We don’t need to go seeking for the sea monsters deep in the abyss of our store consciousness. With the practice of mindfulness, our suffering naturally arise from our store consciousness. When suffering or habits arises, we can be curious and ask “who are you?” Allowing us to be curious about which of our ancestors are present in us; whether or not we have met them. When we come to retreats, we think that we are going “alone.” In fact, we are bringing our whole family and ancestral lineage. If we are lucky, we will be renewed and have a deeper taste of what it means to be human.