Secret Leaders with Dan Murray-Serter & Chris Donnelly

The Truth about Masculinity: Have we really created weak & Toxic Men? & How to fix it - Sam Conniff

Mar 25, 2025

Sam Conniff, an entrepreneur and best-selling author behind the Hard as Nails campaign, tackles the pressing crisis of modern masculinity. He discusses how societal norms have led to a generation of men struggling with toxic influences, including the controversial teachings of figures like Andrew Tate. Sam emphasizes the importance of redefining strength through empathy and vulnerability, illustrating the need for healthier masculine role models. He advocates for a transformation in leadership that fosters connection and personal growth for the next generation.

01:19:26

Episode guests

Sam Conniff

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Episode notes

Podcast summary created with Snipd AI

Quick takeaways

The podcast explores how societal expectations of masculinity, embodied in harmful phrases, create emotional confines for men, leading to isolation and mental health crises.

Sam Conniff highlights the dangerous influence of high-profile figures promoting rigid masculinity, urging a redefinition that embraces emotional intelligence and vulnerability.

The notion of 'man in a box' illustrates how traditional masculinity constricts self-expression, necessitating a supportive community for open conversations about identity and connection.

Deep dives

Questioning Traditional Masculinity

The podcast examines the phrases often taught to boys, such as 'boys don’t cry' and 'toughen up,' urging listeners to question the implications of these stereotypes. It highlights how high-profile figures like Andrew Tate and Donald Trump promote a rigid view of masculinity, contributing to societal issues associated with toxic masculinity. Men are urged to recognize that masculinity is not about adhering to a set of predefined success metrics tied to money or strength, but rather involves a broader understanding of one’s identity. This shift in perspective is essential as traditional ideals can lead to internal conflict and a sense of failure when men feel they don’t measure up.

Intro

2min

Redefining Masculinity

28min

Navigating the Complexities of Empathy in Leadership and Masculinity

5min

Leadership and the Masculine Paradox

8min

Redefining Masculinity Through Leadership and Vulnerability

5min

Exploring Masculinity through Gaming and Personal Experiments

4min

Reevaluating Masculinity: A Journey of Self-Discovery

22min

Redefining Masculinity: Stepping Outside the Man Box

2min

What does "toxic masculinity" really mean?

In this powerful episode, Sam Conniff dives deep into the crisis of modern masculinity, exploring how society has shaped a generation of men caught between weakness and toxicity.

Sam shares his growing concern for younger men, especially after experiencing Andrew Tate’s controversial online course first hand. With Tate’s influence surging, amplified by the recent Netflix hit Adolescence, a show that exposes the dark side of online radicalization, Sam questions how these messages are shaping vulnerable minds.

Drawing from personal insight and time spent researching the topic, Sam reveals why we’re failing men and offers a bold roadmap to fix it, redefining strength, purpose, and connection for the next generation.

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