In this episode I look at a listener's first page and offer robust, honest feedback. I talk about first sentences, the art of parallel construction, pronoun confusion, character crush and much more. This is a great episode to listen to if you want to know: - what makes a great first line? - how can I open a scene? - how can I arrange information to make it easy for the reader to follow? - how many named characters can I have in a first scene? - how can I think about the cadence of a sentence? If you'd like to support me, the podcast and all the things I'm putting out into the world, if you like what I do and would like me to do more of it, and if you'd like to be the first to read my brand new novel, please help me by pre-ordering a copy of THE ICE HOUSE. It's got an old lady pulled out of retirement for one last job, a 400-year-old forensic pathologist field medic battle nun looking to bring down an empire, psychedelics, dungeon crawls, jungle adventures, a locked-room murder mystery, intrigue, romance, minotaurs, a secret testing facility, giant sentient beetles, immortal mutant aristocrats, knife fights, an angel, larceny and ancient menaces rising from the depths. You're going to dig it and it helps me so much. Here are some places you can order now: Mr B's Emporium are an indie bookstore who deliver worldwide - I'll sign all pre-ordered copies from here: mrbsemporium.com/shop/books/the-ice-house/ Wordery: https://wordery.com/the-ice-house-tim-clare-9781786894816#oid=1908_1 Amazon: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Ice-House-Tim-Clare/dp/1786894815/ Or ask at your local bricks and mortar bookshop. If you'd like to read a story about a 13 year old girl investigating a secret society in 1930s Norfolk, grab a copy of my novel, THE HONOURS: https://wordery.com/the-honours-tim-clare-9781782114765#oid=1908_1 If you'd like to sign up to my free Weekly Writing Workout, here's the sign up form: eepurl.com/gbmfcP Here's my author page on Facebook: www.facebook.com/timclarepoet/ Here's my Twitter page: twitter.com/TimClarePoet And here's my website where you can submit your first pages or just get in touch and say hello: www.timclarepoet.co.uk And if you'd like to support the podcast, here's my Ko-fi page: www.ko-fi.com/timclare