Mormon and Neurodivergent (Autism and ADHD) - Paul Martinez | Ep. 1986

Jan 24, 2025

Join Paul Martinez, a courageous Mormon convert with high-functioning autism and ADHD, as he shares his deeply personal journey. He discusses how neurodivergence can lead to vulnerabilities in abusive relationships and the emotional complexities of faith in a high-demand religious context. Paul reflects on childhood challenges, family dynamics, and the transformative impact of embracing his identity. With insightful anecdotes, he navigates the intersection of mental health and spirituality, celebrating resilience and self-discovery in the face of adversity.

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ANECDOTE

Paul's Early Life

Paul Martinez had a difficult childhood marked by his neurodivergent father's unpredictable anger and a contentious divorce.
He felt isolated, lacked family support, and struggled to form lasting friendships.

ANECDOTE

High School Interests

In high school, Paul excelled academically and found solace in skateboarding and chess.
A meaningful relationship with another person who had experienced abuse provided support during this time.

ANECDOTE

Early Experiences with Love

Paul's childhood experiences left him feeling unlovable and unworthy, leading to self-critical thoughts.
His concept of love was underdeveloped due to his family dynamic and challenges with alexithymia, a difficulty processing emotions.

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Paul reflects on his journey from being raised in the Mormon church to eventually leaving it. He opens up about his childhood, feeling isolated due to his neurodivergence, and his complicated relationship with his family. Paul shares his path to Mormonism, how he felt a strong connection to the faith at first, and his experiences as a missionary, including the challenges he faced in Argentina. Over time, he became disillusioned with the church, particularly after learning new information and struggling with its stance on LGBTQ issues. As Paul navigates life post-church, he discusses his career, his evolving understanding of love and relationships, and the healing process through music and self-reflection. The episode explores his feelings of loneliness, the importance of recognizing toxic behavior, and his journey to self-acceptance after leaving the Mormon faith.

Show Notes

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00:03:35 Defining neurodivergence

00:14:30 Religious experiences before the LDS church

00:27:18 First introduction to Morminsim

00:47:28 Mission call to Buenos Aires and being pressured to confess sexual sins

01:00:55 How neurodivergence played into his mission

01:16:28 Parental alienation & trying to reconnect with his mom

01:32:58 “Mormonism is passive aggressive”

01:41:25 Paul began to get in trouble for questioning priesthood holders

01:59:20 November 2015 LGBT policy and Paul’s choice to stop attending church

02:14:50 Feeling love from the members, but not the institution

02:28:25 Narcissists only see their own reality

02:44:10 Do you feel more fulfilled than when you were Mormon?

02:56:04 Final questions - “Where will you go?”

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