Why You Blame Yourself for Everything

Sep 5, 2024

Explore the reasons behind self-blame and its roots in childhood trauma. Discover how this cognitive distortion offers a false sense of control while leading to guilt and shame. The podcast emphasizes the importance of recognizing these patterns to foster healthier emotional responses. With relatable examples like Batman, it also shares practical strategies for overcoming self-blame and reclaiming personal responsibility, helping listeners shift toward more constructive thinking for personal growth.

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Intro

00:00 • 2min

Understanding the Pitfalls of Self-Blame

01:46 • 6min

Overcoming Self-Blame: Understanding and Reclaiming Personal Responsibility

07:43 • 8min

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In this podcast, you’ll learn why you might blame yourself for everything, how this can be a trauma response from your childhood, and how to stop doing it. And we’re going to use Batman as an example.

It’s clear to see how taking the mental shortcut of “It’s all my fault” is actually a much easier route than the emotional gymnastics of figuring out why people do bad things. But, if we keep blaming ourselves over time, we can end up feeling guilty, ashamed, depressed, or angry.

So in this podcast, we’ll explore this common cognitive distortion of self-blame and some practical ways to replace it with more helpful thinking.

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Therapy in a Nutshell and the information provided by Emma McAdam are solely intended for informational and entertainment purposes and are not a substitute for advice, diagnosis, or treatment regarding medical or mental health conditions. Although Emma McAdam is a licensed marriage and family therapist, the views expressed on this site or any related content should not be taken for medical or psychiatric advice. Always consult your physician before making any decisions related to your physical or mental health. In therapy I use a combination of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Systems Theory, positive psychology, and a bio-psycho-social approach to treating mental illness and other challenges we all face in life. The ideas from my videos are frequently adapted from multiple sources. Many of them come from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, especially the work of Steven Hayes, Jason Luoma, and Russ Harris. The sections on stress and the mind-body connection derive from the work of Stephen Porges (the Polyvagal theory), Peter Levine (Somatic Experiencing) Francine Shapiro (EMDR), and Bessel Van Der Kolk. I also rely heavily on the work of the Arbinger Institute for my overall understanding of our ability to choose our life's direction.

And deeper than all of that, the Gospel of Jesus Christ orients my personal worldview and sense of security, peace, hope, and love https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/comeuntochrist/believe

If you are in crisis, please contact the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org or 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or your local emergency services.