Brittany Joy: Validating Anger to Dissolve Mommy Guilt

Bio: Brittany Joy is a mother of 2 toddlers, a writer, a serial coffee drinker, and a passionate self- acceptance advocate. She lives in a small rural town with her outdoorsy husband and their kids. She has been blogging at Bodacious Brittany for two years on topics including self-acceptance, recovering from diet culture, marriage, and motherhood. She is many things, but most importantly she is herself - and is passionate about helping women be bodaciously themselves too.

Show notes: 

• Calm your nervous system, set boundaries, heal your inner child, discover the wounds that are still holding you back, explore your sensuality and so much more with Maddy's Feminine Spirit School. Early bird closes on May 21 at 11:59 pm EST. Sign up HERE. 
• Brittany is a unique combination of Earth momma while boldly speaking her truth.
• Motherhood is a very tribal thing — we emulate other women so it often can lead to doing things how everyone else does them.
• Why she doesn’t believe you need to put yourself in the box as a "stay at home mom" or a "working mom" (father’s don’t identify with this) and why she prefers the term, "primary caregiver."
• Her traditional roots and not so traditional roots as she grew up in foster care with a dad in prison. 
• Her painful early childhood trauma and why doesn't have a lot of memories before the age of 8. 
• Attachment style and how this looked for her. 
• Her book recommendations by Dr. Daniel Siegel: The Whole-Brain Child, No Drama Discipline, Parenting From the Inside Out
• “You will unconsciously press your own childhood trauma onto your children if you don’t work through your own pain.”
• Why she had a very anxious attachment to her mother and then to her husband and how she healed it.
• The science between experiencing trauma in the womb and how it's lasting impact. 
• “In marriage, we do the work that we didn’t do in childhood.”
• Brittany's guest article: Do Good Moms Get Angry? 
• The 4-month postpartum hormonal time when you often think you have postpartum depression.
• Her intense anger with potty-training her daughter.
• Cognitive behavioral therapy and how it's helped her anger/anxiety.
• "We all have to do the work to heal the wound that we're not a good enough mother."
• Things that have helped her with her anger: Finding friends who you can trust to talk to, walking — something physical after her kids go to bed, validating anger and exploring anger, saying out loud: "I feel so angry about this."
• 2 questions to ask: What did my mom do that made her a good mom? What did my mom do that made her a bad mom?
• “It does actually take a lot to be a bad mom.”
• What makes you a bad mom in her opinion. 
• "Really, parents are just doing the best that they can."
• The importance of presence and how to know when it’s good to step away.
• “It’s not disloyal to realize that your parents weren’t perfect.” - Terri Cole
• What removing social media from her life has created for her.
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Connect with Brittany:

• Instagram
• Website

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