Marriage in the Bible is a binfire

Oct 27, 2025

Dr. Charlotte Naylor-Davis, a biblical scholar, dives into the complexities of marriage in the Bible. She challenges the idea of a singular, ideal marriage model, presenting varied examples, from the polygamy of Abraham to the pragmatic bond of Ruth and Boaz. She scrutinizes the influence of Paul's teachings amidst a patriarchal context, emphasizing the dangers of misinterpreting submission in marriage. The conversation also highlights the erotic perspective of the Song of Songs, urging listeners to rethink historical views of marriage.

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INSIGHT

No Single Biblical Model Of Marriage

The Bible contains many different models of marriage written across eras, not a single unified 'biblical' marriage.
Treat texts as diverse stories and teachings, not one monolithic rulebook.

ANECDOTE

Abraham, Sarah And Hagar Example

Charlotte uses Abraham, Sarah and Hagar to show polygamy and the coercion of handmaids into sexual roles.
Hagar is presented as property with no clear consent, resembling sex trafficking.

ANECDOTE

Jacob, Rachel And Leah Story

Jacob loves Rachel but is tricked into marrying Leah and then takes more wives, producing the twelve tribes.
The story models polygamy, deception, and women reduced to consolation through childbirth.

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A binfire? Bit harsh? Not unless you’ve read the thing… Here Dr Charlotte Naylor Davis takes us on a tour of the Bible to see if we can find an example of a marriage we’d actually want to emulate.

Content warning: This series covers issues of sexual relationships, abuse, gender and identity, so listener discretion is advised. In particular, this episode contains references to sexual violence, rape and femicide as depicted in the Old Testament. Please look after yourselves.

The modern church likes to appeal to something called the ‘biblical doctrine of marriage’ but the evidence for such a thing feels a little thin on the ground. We examine the examples of attitudes towards marriage found in the Old Testament texts and ask what we should be doing with the ancient erotica of Songs of Solomon.

We then explore marriage in the New Testament. Many of our biblical ideas about marriage come from the writing of Paul, so we unpick some of his teaching and motivations. Crucially, how wise is it to create eternal rules from the ideas of a man who was convinced the world was about to end?

Coming up

Our next Q&A episode is on 10 November, so if you’d like to ask a question on anything you’ve heard from the podcast so far, then make sure you get your question to us by Friday 31 October to feature. Contact us via email, social media or our Substack page.

Episode 4 – The binfire rages on – is released on Monday 24 November. Simon will be picking up the batten and running headlong through two millenia of Church history to explain how we arrived at our present day conception of marriage.

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