On the Wednesday podcast, I get to talk with members of the Organize 365® community as they share the challenges, progress, missteps and triumphs along their organizing journey. You can see and hear transformation in action. I look forward to helping YOU learn the skill of organization, too!
In this episode, I introduce you to Jacquie Denny, a Cincinnati native and Founder of Everything But The House. I remember calling Jacquie many years ago to have breakfast to talk about Organize 365®. Jacquie had discovered her own successful business through settling her father’s estate and I was looking to pick her brain. She watched as the auctioneer sold her father’s items for pennies on the dollar and thought there just had to be a better way. She also knew that children or loved ones settling an estate likely have full time jobs on top of trying to settle an estate, which is like a full time job of its own. She stumbled into solving a large need for people in her surrounding area by sharing her lived experiences to make others’ lives easier. Now Jacquie finds herself becoming like a family member, almost like a therapist, to families as they navigate this difficult time.
Jacquie was an empty nester for 18 months till Jacquie’s dad got a cancer diagnosis. Caring for your parents is so much different than caring for your children. You don’t know how long they will be with you. You may not realize all the appointments they now have, prescriptions that need to be picked up, unexpected lengthy tests they may need. You may even need to cook for them, possibly feed them, and assist in daily hygiene. Unfortunately over the course of 10 years, Jacquie and her husband said goodbye to all of their parents. Jacquie really shared a lot about what it takes to care for loved ones and the toll it takes on the caregiver. And in the end, all of the arrangements that need to be made during an emotional time. Nowadays it's common to not live in the same state as your parents or siblings. Often, parents have remarried and we find ourselves as executors of multiple estates. As their decline begins, it’s a good time to discuss with siblings, or whomever will be helping with caregiving, what the expectations are based on convenience, what your job will allow, and proximity to the loved one.
Jacquie had been a stay at home mom when her father passed. After settling one estate after another, her family defaulted to her because she was a stay at home mom and had done it before. Settling an estate is an all consuming process! Jacquie’s business filled this void. She started working her business on the weekends while her husband traveled for work. Little did she know that her business would explode when she went online, with the help of her business partner Brian in 2008. At the end of the day, one of the things that helps Jacquie with her families is organization! Things are going to change and be unpredictable, but with organization it’s easier to pivot. Jacquie’s hope is that all of us will use our experiences and hand down advice to our children on how to survive it better. Do as we learned, not as we did.
Jacquie’s advice is…
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The more organized you can be, the better off you’ll be because things continually change.
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Utilize a lot of communication and patience to sustain sibling/other caregiver relationships.
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Don’t assume your support system knows what you need in your caregiving role.
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If your loved one is not in a facility, contribute how you can remotely with:
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Sporadic visits where you assume a lot of the daily responsibilities to give siblings or whomever a break. Do some deep cleaning or make freezer meals for when you head home. Help them run errands or pick up their kids (your nieces/nephews) from sports or activities.
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Cold hard cash to cover the meals, gas, prescriptions, personal care items of your loved one.
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Be creative on how you can lighten the load and show you care.
EPISODE RESOURCES:
I am grateful that you are reaching out to share your stories and progress with me and with the Organize 365® community. If you are ready to share your story with us, please apply at https://organize365.com/wednesday.
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