EP. 343: Raising Emotionally Safe Kids After Domestic Abuse with Dr. Shafer Stedron

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Sometimes the biggest breakthrough comes from dropping the mask and reclaiming your story after decades of living someone else's version of your life. Dr. Shafer Stedron knows this journey intimately.

Dr. Shafer is a neurologist, life coach, author, and host of Talks with Dr. Shafer. Drawing from both clinical expertise and lived experience, she helps others reframe their stories with creativity, compassion, and courage. Her work explores the intersections of burnout, movement, and emotional regulation, plus why traditional systems often fail ADHD minds.

In this conversation, Dr. Shafer and Tracy dive into the reality of being neurodivergent in medicine—from the 2016 study showing 34% of medical students with disabilities have ADHD, to why doctors with ADHD often catch things others miss (hello, pattern recognition and environmental scanning). They explore Shafer's journey from a 19-year-old who said yes to marriage after two weeks, through decades of domestic abuse, to finally learning to listen to her "harm alarm" and reclaim her story.

Dr. Shafer also shares her approach to helping people drop the mask and create what she calls a "bubble sheet"—not a linear trajectory, but a sheet covered with all your goals and interests, because that's who you are as a person. Plus, she breaks down her children's book The Boy and His Brightly Colored Blocks, which explores pathological demand avoidance and why connection beats correction every time.

Resources:

Website: drshaferstedronova.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/talks_with_dr_shafer
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@TalkswithDrShafer 
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/shafer-stedron-4b7a19263 

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