113: How Parts Work Transforms Polyamory: Transforming Jealousy, Fear, and Attachment Wounds

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In this episode, Kiley explores how Parts Work, most commonly associated with Dr. Richard C. Schwartz’s Internal Family Systems (IFS) model, can transform your experience of polyamory and consensual non-monogamy.

You’ll learn how to identify your inner Managers, Firefighters, and Exiles, and how to lead from your calm, compassionate Self — even in the middle of jealousy, fear of abandonment, or metamour conflict.

We’ll also connect these tools to Jessica Fern’s Polysecure, showing how parts work can help you earn secure attachment both within yourself and with your partners. Plus, Kiley shares her own journey of meeting protective and wounded parts with curiosity and compassion instead of reactivity.

Referenced Resources & Books:

• No Bad Parts — Richard C. Schwartz
• Internal Family Systems Therapy, Second Edition — Richard C. Schwartz & Martha Sweezy
• Polysecure — Jessica Fern
• Self-Therapy — Jay Earley
• Free IFS meditations — IFS-Institute.com
• Jay Earley’s Parts Work Exercises — SelfTherapy.org

Whether you’re new to parts work or deep into your own IFS journey, this episode offers practical tools for emotional regulation, self-compassion, and building security in the beautiful complexity of polyamory.

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