"That’s Awkward!" The Power of Words and Labels on Your Relationship to Self and Others Ep. 289

Elliott sent me this Key and Peele clip the other day: https://www.youtube.com/shorts/wOBNm_8zw4I

I immediately texted back, “We need to record an episode about this!” The bit starts with Key sharing an unpopular opinion about a movie.  Peele responds with a phrase we hear all the time these days, “That’s awkward!” Key is confused. What’s awkward about an opinion? He protests but Peele continues to shut him down with dismissive phrases like, “Okay . . . ” and “All right . . .” It’s a funny sketch that reveals a great deal about our current social environment. The terms and phrases we use are powerful—they reflect current norms while also framing how we experience our interactions and relationships. Meaning, when we perceive common day-to-day conversations as “awkward,” we respond accordingly i.e. we tell ourselves to be uncomfortable and hence increase the likelihood we’ll feel anxious. Think about it. We could just as easily label common day-to-day conversations as “normal—maybe surprising, maybe confusing, but normal” and thereby respond in kind. Elliott and I discuss the psychological implications of using common phrases—like, “That’s awkward” and, “I have anxiety about that!”—and how these impact our emotional wellbeing. 

Specifically, we consider:

• The societal norms which make the clip funny.
• How labeling a situation informs our emotional response.
• The harm of labeling ourselves in a fixed, immutable manner e.g., “I have anxiety.”
• The influence of constant phone usage on our friendships, psychological health, and humanity in general.
• How to decrease disempowered self-talk and replace it with empowered self-talk.

Join us as we examine what’s really going on behind phrases like, “That’s awkward!” and “I have anxiety!”

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Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson

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