621: Are You at Fault for Being Sexually Assaulted? | Feedback Friday
Feb 4, 2022
The hosts tackle a listener's troubling encounter with a friend, navigating the complexities of consent and emotional fallout after a night of drinking. They discuss feelings of guilt surrounding sexual assault and emphasize the importance of personal boundaries. The conversation also touches on rebuilding social connections post-pandemic, tackling the impact of gaslighting on relationships, and humorous insights about essential oils. Finally, they offer practical strategies for managing family dynamics and workplace challenges.
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question_answer ANECDOTE
Unwanted Advances After a Night Out
A woman went out drinking with friends, including one who had previously had a crush on her.
She woke up to him touching her without consent after he'd stayed the night.
volunteer_activism ADVICE
Defining the Incident as Assault
Jordan Harbinger and Dr. Erin Margolis agree the incident was sexual assault, despite the woman's drinking.
The man's dismissive response, claiming mutual passion, is manipulative and gaslighting.
volunteer_activism ADVICE
Reflect on Boundary Setting
Harbinger encourages self-reflection on boundary-setting.
He suggests exploring potential patterns of people-pleasing or conflict avoidance.
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A "friend" who once admitted to having a crush on you came over to continue a night of drinking and crash on the couch. You pushed him away when he tried to kiss you because the crush isn't mutual and you have a boyfriend. Then you woke up in the middle of the night to him spooning, touching, and trying to make out with you. You pushed him away again and went back to sleep. Is this a form of sexual assault, or did you cheat by allowing yourself to get drunk and winding up in this situation? We'll try to find answers to this and more here on Feedback Friday!
And in case you didn't already know it, Jordan Harbinger (@JordanHarbinger) and Gabriel Mizrahi (@GabeMizrahi) banter and take your comments and questions for Feedback Friday right here every week! If you want us to answer your question, register your feedback, or tell your story on one of our upcoming weekly Feedback Friday episodes, drop us a line at friday@jordanharbinger.com. Now let's dive in!
Were you sexually assaulted by the "friend" who kept trying to make out with you one drunken night, or did you cheat by allowing yourself to get drunk and winding up in this situation?
You feel like the past two years of the pandemic have dulled your ability to converse smoothly with other human beings, and you worry this is damaging your relationships. What can you do to regain what used to come so naturally?
Your young, sweet neighbor is a stay-at-home mom of four kids, and married to a teacher. She's also embroiled in an MLM scheme and you want to help her see a way out before her family's modest savings are emptied by shysters. What can you do?
You've never gotten along with your snarky mother-in-law, and the tension has only increased since you gave birth to your son. On top of this, your husband takes her side in any disputes, and you're mentally exhausted by all of it. What should you do?
You're an in-house art director for an advertising company, where people are so competitive and credit-hungry that stealing work is not uncommon. You've collaborated with partners who completely dismissed and gaslighted your contributions. How can you nip this behavior in the bud before you're actually driven to kill somebody at your office?
Have any questions, comments, or stories you'd like to share with us? Drop us a line at friday@jordanharbinger.com!
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