How Stoics Deal with Rude People - Wisdom from Marcus Aurelius | The Everyday Stoic

How should we deal with rude people? It’s a question that comes up again and again, and in this episode, we turn to Marcus Aurelius for the answer. In Book 9 of his Meditations, the great Roman emperor laid out a simple but profound exercise that can be done in seconds, an exercise that shifts our perspective, grounds us in virtue, and helps us respond wisely instead of reacting with anger.

William unpacks this teaching in practical, everyday terms, showing how we can apply it when we’re cut off in traffic, confronted with harsh words, or faced with everyday frustrations. Drawing on Aurelius as well as Viktor Frankl’s reminder of the “space between stimulus and response,” he explains how the Stoics urged us to first return to our own directing mind, then remember our place within the greater whole, and finally see the other person with compassion rather than hostility.

Rudeness, from the Stoic perspective, is not an obstacle but an opportunity, a sparring partner that gives us the chance to practice patience, empathy, and resilience. By pausing, recalling our shared humanity, and choosing to act with wisdom, courage, temperance, and justice, we not only protect our own peace of mind but also contribute to harmony in the wider world. This is timeless Stoic advice, and it remains just as relevant today.