A guy calls me in a state of panic that his elderly client may have been abducted by Johnny Depp.

Afterwards a caller attempts to navigate a difficult relationship with the father of her soon to be born child, and a final caller explains how they’ve gotten how far they’ve been able to get in life by doing as little work as possible.

Send your mother an email. I am a gecko.

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“I THINK THE OLD LADY I WORK FOR GOT KIDNAPPED”