Ep49: Expressing Feelings at Work with Melanie Katzman
Sep 13, 2019
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Melanie Katzman, author of 'Connect First,' discusses the importance of expressing feelings at work. She emphasizes the power of vulnerability and apologizing without justification. They also explore building relationships, effective communication, and reducing ego for better outcomes.
Embracing emotions is crucial for creating passionate and caring workplaces, as work is not just about thinking but also the full range of human experience.
Giving and receiving authentic apologies strengthens relationships, demonstrates empathy, and facilitates growth and understanding.
Deep dives
The Power of Emotion in the Workplace
The podcast episode explores the importance of embracing emotions and discussing feelings in the workplace. The guest emphasizes that tapping into emotions is essential for creating passionate and caring workplaces. The fear of vulnerability and the attachment to reason often prevent people from acknowledging and addressing emotions. The guest suggests that work is not just about thinking, but also about the full range of human experience. Emphasizing the importance of clear and empathetic communication, the guest advises individuals to speak in simple terms and avoid complex jargon. The episode highlights the significance of vulnerability, recognizing the shared stake, and the power of authentic apologies.
The Art of Apologizing
The podcast discusses the art of giving and receiving apologies. The guest emphasizes that apologizing takes confidence and is not a sign of weakness. An effective apology requires specificity and an understanding of the impact of one's actions. The guest advises avoiding justifications and allowing the person receiving the apology to express their feelings. Genuine apologies open conversations and demonstrate respect and empathy. The episode encourages individuals to accept apologies gracefully and sit with the discomfort of receiving an apology without negating it. It concludes that apologies strengthen relationships and facilitate growth and understanding.
Collaborating and Winning Support
The podcast explores strategies for collaborating with others and gaining support for one's vision or ideas in the workplace. The guest suggests that deepening relationships and building a support network are more effective than playing politics. When encountering resistance or lack of understanding, the guest advises simplifying communication and focusing on shared outcomes. It is important to translate ideas into terms that others can appreciate and to listen to their perspectives. The episode highlights the value of humility, dropping the ego, and recognizing the importance of strong relationships in achieving common goals.
There are lots of “F” words that we’re supposed to avoid in the workplace. Fear. Failure. Flirting. Fighting. And of course, the word to end all “F” words, which I won’t say because I like to avoid an explicit rating! But there’s another F word, and this one we avoid at our peril: Feelings. Our question this episode: how can we talk about our feelings at work?
My guest today is Melanie Katzman, PhD, author of the forthcoming book, "Connect First: 52 Simple Ways to Ignite Success, Meaning, and Joy at Work" (McGraw-Hill, Oct 22, 2019). Melanie offers us some quick and easy ways to create more connection in the workplace by embracing our feelings and emotions, rather than avoiding them. We also discuss the art of asking for and receiving an apology, and strategies for moving forward with a vision or project when your colleagues aren’t on the same wavelength. Hosted by Beth L. Buelow, PCC. More info at howcanisaythis.com