ENFP Living Abroad: How To Communicate Better and Stay Your True Self (Ask Dan)

I've received a question from a fellow ENFP, Judy, a Syrian living in the Netherlands for the past 3 years.

She says she picked up the language pretty quickly and started her Bachelor's degree this year, which was great, but there is a problem:

"Everywhere I go, I find myself feeling like an outsider.

It's such a shame that I barely interact or hang out with my classmates or roommates unless I'm drunk because I'm insecure about my Dutch and it makes me appear as less friendly, but silent and distant.

Which is, of course, a nightmare for an ENFP.

Aside from that, I can't relate or be engaged with most subjects that are brought up in a typical conversation and the Dutch are really distant people and difficult to approach unless they're drunk.

So I truly miss the Syrian spontaneity in everything. When I use English, though, I am way more open, can have fun conversations easily and express myself way better and just be myself.

The only problem is it is really awkward to start speaking English out of nowhere with everyone and it is not very beneficial for learning Dutch.

So do you have a tip for me to be myself, communicate better with native speakers, and use a new language?"

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