

Episode 117: Dr Tina Payne Bryson & the science in action
21 snips Sep 22, 2025
In this engaging discussion, Dr. Tina Payne Bryson, a bestselling author and psychotherapist, dives into the intersection of science and parenting. She breaks down complex concepts like attachment theory, emphasizing the importance of the 'Four S's'—safe, seen, soothed, secure. Tina shares practical strategies for managing neurodiversity and co-regulation. Also, she discusses how to reframe discipline as a teaching tool, encouraging emotional growth in children. With insightful references to pop culture, including The Sopranos, she highlights the journey to earned secure attachment.
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Combine Bottom-Up And Top-Down Regulation
- Use bottom-up and top-down strategies together to help kids regulate in the moment.
- Provide sensory input or breathing (bottom-up) when higher-level CBT tools (top-down) fail during panic or flooding.
Secure Attachment Is Earned Repeatedly
- Secure attachment is built by repeated experiences of being safe, seen, soothed, and secure.
- History is not destiny; reflective parents can 'earn' secure attachment with consistent repair and attunement.
Repair First, Then Enforce Limits
- Delay big reactions and return later to set limits from calmness rather than anger.
- Frame consequences as safety decisions and give concrete behaviors to 'rebuild trust' with deposits.