Roll reversal in tango challenges established roles and can cause panic and confusion in various situations.
Recording conversations with loved ones suffering from dementia helps to capture moments of clarity and strengthen the bond.
Deep dives
Roll Reversal in Tango
In the podcast, the discussion revolves around the concept of roll reversal in tango, where the woman takes the lead instead of the man. This is often challenging because couples who are used to fixed roles find it difficult to adapt. The phenomenon of panic and confusion when established roles are mixed up is not unique to tango but occurs in various situations.
Losing the Recognition of Loved Ones
The podcast shares the personal experience of the producer, B. A. Parker, whose loved ones started to become unrecognizable to her. The focus is on the relationship with her father, who suffers from stage three vascular dementia. Despite the emotional connection and shared memories, the disease progresses and causes the father to forget even simple things like his daughter's name, leading to a sense of loss and confusion for both of them.
Holding Onto Memories and Creating New Connections
Parker explores the strategies she tries to stay connected with her father and grandmother amidst their declining cognitive abilities. She records conversations with her father, hoping to capture glimpses of his old self, and she creates fictional updates about her life to engage him. Similarly, her grandmother writes down phone conversations as a way to retain their moments together. The podcast emphasizes the value of these connections and highlights the occasional moments of clarity and recognition that offer solace and strengthen their bond.
Producer B.A. Parker started recording her calls with her father because she was concerned about the care at his nursing home. But the recordings gave her a window into something very different: their relationship. So she started recording her calls with her grandmother as well. A story of relationships told through the small recorded calls between people who love each other.