I get stuck in The Shoulds all the time – should be thinner, richer, more successful, blah, blah, blah – and write about it from time to time in my newsletter, blog and Facebook community…so that’s what this episode is all about.

Because Shoulding Yourself is universal.

My dear pal, Vivian Manning-Schaffel, has taken this universal feeling to a whole new level with a brilliant piece she wrote for Shondaland, How to Stop 'Shoulding' Yourself. Vivian explores the neuroscience of what this obligatory self-talk does to your psyche and gives pointers from experts on how to cultivate more grace and self-compassion so you can truly thrive in life.

Vivian Manning-Schaffel is a seasoned storyteller who conjures compelling narratives about people, places, and things with a focus on the intersection of pop culture and human behavior. She is a regular contributor to Shondaland.com and has written for the TODAY Show website, NBC News BETTER, The Cut, the New York Daily News, The Week, Medium, DAME, Prevention, The New York Times, Time Out New York, The New York Post, CBS Watch!, Jezebel, Gothamist, and a host of other publications. She's also been a contributing writer/editor at NBC News, Working Mother magazine, and Time Out New York Kids. So yeah, it was quite flattering when she asked to interview me for her recent piece!

Learn more about Vivan’s work at vivianmanningschaffel.com. You can follow her on twitter @soapboxdirty and instagram @veemanning.

Listen in and add onto our conversation by connecting with me at bba@abelintermedia.com. I’d love to hear from you! Do it because you WANT to, not because you SHOULD ;)

Stop Shoulding Yourself with Vivian Manning-Schaffel