What if the hardest part of surgery wasn’t physical recovery, but emotional healing? In this episode, Jordan shares his journey with post-surgical depression and anxiety after undergoing open-heart surgery at just 24 years old.

He describes how intrusive thoughts, shame, and hopelessness set in after his operation—and how getting the right diagnosis and treatment (including medication) finally brought relief. Jordan also opens up about living with anxiety, why “calm down” is the worst thing you can say to someone experiencing it, and how curiosity, listening, and silence can be the most supportive responses.

Terri and Dr. Anita also share their own experiences with post-surgical mood changes, highlighting how common and under-discussed they are. This episode is both validating and practical, reminding us that emotional recovery is just as real—and just as important—as physical healing.

Primary Topics Covered

Jordan’s open-heart surgery at age 24 and its impact on mental health
The difference between physical and emotional recovery after surgery
Post-surgical depression (cardiac depression) and how common it is
Intrusive thoughts, shame, and the link to OCD
How medication (SSRIs) eased anxiety and intrusive thoughts
Why “calm down” is not helpful for someone with anxiety
Better ways to support people living with anxiety or depression
Terri and Dr. Anita’s own experiences with post-surgical depression
The importance of recognizing and naming post-surgical emotional struggles

Timestamps

00:00 - Introduction and welcome
02:21 - Anxiety and depression often go hand-in-hand
03:07 - Jordan’s story: diagnosed with congenital heart condition at 24
03:36 - The shock of open-heart surgery for a young athlete
04:21 - Emotional recovery harder than physical recovery
04:54 - Intrusive thoughts, shame, and depression after surgery
05:45 - Post-surgical depression: how common it is after heart surgery
06:32 - Struggles with medical professionals and finding the right psychiatrist
06:54 - OCD diagnosis, SSRI medication, and relief from intrusive thoughts
07:36 - Jordan explains what anxiety feels like from the inside
08:08 - Why telling someone to “calm down” makes things worse
09:32 - How to truly support someone with anxiety
11:40 - Misconceptions about asking people about suicide or anxiety
12:25 - Why talking openly creates safety and connection
13:56 - Jordan’s closing reflections: self-knowledge and validation
14:46 - Terri and Dr. Anita share their own post-surgical depression experiences
17:00 - Closing thoughts and resources

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What Happens When You Die | John Burke