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It might feel like terrible news that building our pack leadership involves going back into our own childhoods. It can feel scary to go back to the “belly of the beast”… after all, you survived your childhood.
Who on this God’s green earth would actually choose to look back when you’re so focused on changing cycles and moving forward?
When the patterns we’re trying to break involve the often invisible trauma of emotional neglect, they can be extra tough to identify. Grownups raised by neglectful parents can feel like their experiences weren’t “bad” enough to count, or that they should just feel lucky because other kids had it way worse.
My guest this week is Ruth Cohn, an amazing therapist and author who writes about what she calls “the invisible trauma” of neglect. Why it can be hard to realize that neglect IS traumatic, how it affects the way we live, and how much we tend to blame ourselves for things that aren’t in our control. If you’re a parent who’s trying to do better than the way you were raised, you have to hear her wisdom!
As always, thanks for listening. Head over to Facebook, where you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community. We post tips and tools and do pop-up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it!
Get all the links, resources, and transcripts here: https://mastermindparenting.com/podcast-316
About Randi Rubenstein
Randi Rubenstein coaches parents raising strong-willed kids. Randi searched endlessly to find the magical resource that would help her own highly sensitive, strong-willed child. (He’s now 26, healthy and happy-ish:). She’s been passionate about helping other “cycle-breaker” parents like herself for almost two decades.
Randi’s Web and Social Links
About Ruth Cohn:
Ruth Cohn, MFT, is a psychotherapist living and practicing in the San Francisco Bay area. She has been specializing in work with survivors of trauma and neglect, their intimate partners, and families since 1988. She is a Certified Sex Therapist, certified in Neurofeedback, EMDR, Sensorimotor Psychotherapy, and Imago Relationship Therapy. Ruth is also the author of numerous articles on sexuality, trauma, and neglect, and three books: Working With the Developmental Trauma of Childhood Neglect: Using Psychotherapy and Attachment Theory Techniques in Clinical Practice, Coming Home to Passion: Restoring Loving Sexuality in Couples With Histories of Childhood Trauma and Neglect, and Out of My Mind: Late Night Contemplations About Trauma and Neglect.
Ruth Cohn’s Web and Social Links
Resources Discussed/Links
The Apology, by V (formerly Eve Ensler) https://www.eveensler.org/pf/book-the-apology/
Our 12-week Basics Bootcamp program is now available as a 100% online self-study course! https://mastermindparenting.com/minimasters/
Live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/