59 - TANTRUMS... the ins, the outs and the WTFs with Dr Billy Garvey, developmental paediatrician
Feb 27, 2024
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Dr Billy Garvey, a developmental paediatrician, shares insights on children's tantrums - their causes, handling tips, and red flags. He discusses typical ages for tantrums, minimizing outbursts, and seeking help if needed. The podcast dives into practical strategies for parents dealing with challenging behaviors, emphasizing the importance of self-regulation and communication. Dr Billy's wealth of knowledge benefits families with children of all ages, offering valuable guidance for navigating tantrums effectively.
Kids experience tantrums due to developmental jumps and need support in understanding emotions.
Empathetic responses and minimizing triggers can help de-escalate tantrums effectively for children.
Practical strategies like meeting basic needs, reflecting emotions, and fostering emotional intelligence aid in managing and reducing tantrums.
Deep dives
Supporting Children Through Tantrums
Children experience tantrums due to a developmental jump leading to challenging feelings and an inability to process emotions. Kids exhibit behaviors like running, hitting, and shouting during tantrums. A significant aspect is to help children understand their emotions and guide them effectively through challenging moments. Tantrums are opportunities to show kids unconditional support, aiding in emotional development outside difficult moments.
Responding to Tantrums Empathetically
During tantrums, empathetic responses such as mirroring the child's emotions, getting down to their level, and reflecting their feelings back to them can be effective. Avoiding judgment and minimizing triggers while offering support can help de-escalate emotional distress. Parents can foster a safe environment for children to navigate emotional challenges and learn to regulate emotions effectively.
Practical Tips for Minimizing Tantrums
Practical strategies to minimize tantrums include considering children's basic needs, recognizing triggers, and providing autonomy within limits. Maintaining a calm approach, validating children's emotions, and investing in the relationship during calm moments are crucial. Additionally, reflecting children's emotions, being genuinely curious, and guiding them through difficult emotions can aid in managing and reducing tantrums.
Encouraging Understanding and Role Modeling of Emotions
It is crucial for adults to aim at genuinely understanding children's emotions to offer appropriate support. By openly expressing and managing their own emotions, adults serve as role models for children's emotional development. Additionally, investing time in discussing emotions beyond distress situations aids in building children's emotional intelligence.
Navigating Challenging Parenting Moments and Self-Care
In challenging parenting moments, implementing strategies like 'Plan B,' which prioritize connection and redirecting difficult behaviors positively, can be effective. Parents facing high stress levels should prioritize self-care and mental health to maintain their role as a supportive safety net for children. Emphasizing reflective practice, understanding red flags for abnormal tantrum behaviors, seeking community support, and fostering positive interactions with children are crucial elements in enhancing parenting experiences and children's emotional well-being.
This week we welcome Dr Billy Garvey back to the podcast to share his wisdom on all things tantrums... because let's face it, if we aren't already going through it, we probably will soon enough!
Billy is a developmental paediatrician with nearly 20 years experience working with children in a number of settings. His clinical and research interests include child development and mental health, multidisciplinary collaboration, improving health literacy and promoting community engagement to support all families.
He is also the co-founder and co-host of an excellent podcast - Pop Culture Parenting, which aims support child development and wellbeing using evidence in a meaningful, fun and realistic way. Definitely check it out!
In this podcast we chat to Billy about:
Why do our children tantrum and what is a typical age we can expect them to start
Practical tips we can use to minimise tantrums and what we can do if one has already kicked off
What to do if we as the parent feels like tantrumming and don't have the patience to respond
What to do if a tantrum is affecting your child's safety or other children
Red flags for when it is no longer "normal" tantrumming and where to seek help
Will it ever end
and so much more!
Dr Billy is an absolute wealth of knowledge is so generous with his wisdom. He also shares so much that can benefits families with children of all ages and stages, as well as adults too - we highly recommend you tune in!
You can connect with Billy on Instagram as well as on his podcast (which you can listen to HERE)
Today's episode was brought to you by Stokke. We are long time fans of the Tripp Trapp chair by Stokke - in fact they outnumber Kate's regular chairs at her dining table because she has one for each child! With over 10 colours to choose from and made from solid European wood, this chair is sure to become a feature at your table too as it is suitable from newborn up until adulthood. The foot and seat plates are both highly adjustable to ensure ergonomic seating at every age, which is so important particularly when commencing solids. They are also easy to clean and made with water based, non toxic paint and materials - that means no harmful substances and free from bisphenol and phthalates.
Use the code BOOBTOFOOD to get a FREE Baby Set when you purchase a Tripp Trapp Chair on the Stokke website - valued at $119. Offer valid from 28th February 2024 - 3rd March 2024.
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