The Learning Leader Show With Ryan Hawk

Episode #289: Philip McKernan - Relationships Move At The Speed Of Vulnerability

Show Notes:

Commonalities of sustaining excellence:
- Moments where they feel like a fraud, question themselves. They are more comfortable within those moments
  - This allows them to bounce back quicker
- They seek and attract things that are outside of their normal comfort zone
- The Picasso example -- The courage to face the failure and own up to it
"Vulnerability is the only way to truly deepen relationships"
- "When you say, "I don't know," it helps others feel empowered to help"
Philip felt worthless at age 14. He felt isolated and alone, a burden to try and fit in. "That pain had a purpose."
- How to go from an isolated and alone 14 year old to a keynote speaker who moves people to tears?
How to deal with skeptics?
- "That's okay. But, I would address it now. Couples typically wait five years too long to get counseling. Do it now."
What do you do? "I create environments for people to go deep. I meet them where they're at."
The story of starting this business on the side in an Irish pub.
- "The hardest time of my life was at the beginning, but I didn't allow lack of money to impact what I did."
- "What are you willing to give up to do what you want?"
- "I stopped making the journey about me... It was about them."
Why Philip will not send his kids to college...
- "Spend time learning. You need to understand who you are. A classroom is not built on how to get to know who you are."
The "Planes, Trains, & Automobiles" test:
- Kevin Bacon started his career with no lines... But kept working. "Be willing to put in the work. Run for the cab."
Is "follow your passion good advice?"
- "Yes and no. There is a big difference between excitement and passion. I believe we all have gifts and so many people use their talents."
- "For you, sales was a talent, but your gift is connecting with people. To lift them, to help them, to build confidence."
- "We are all leaders but a lot of people lead from an inauthentic space. It's not what we do, it's how we do it."
What is One Last Talk?
- "If you had 15 minutes left to live to share your message, what would you say? You need to share with the world to free yourself."
- The process creates freedom. People want to connect. This is "team deepening."
Why write a book?
- "Everyone has the capacity to make an impact. I believe all of us carry some demons."
- "It's like five years of therapy in one book." "The book is by me, but it's not for me. I will never sign it."
"One of the greatest burdens a child can bare is the unlived life of their parents."

EXTRA – Defence spending lessons from the Cold War