Shame used to be a regulator. Now it’s background noise. In this bourbon-fueled consult, David and Rob put “Uncle Sam” on the couch and sort the difference between shame (“I am bad”) and guilt (“I did a bad thing”) and why only one reliably leads to repair. We unpack Nathanson’s compass of shame (withdrawal, self-attack, avoidance, other-attack) and how those last two blow up our politics and relationships.
Then we zoom out: social media’s confessional culture gives a quick hit of validation, followed by 2 a.m. regret and next-day loneliness, while partisan incentives reward riding out scandal instead of resigning. Result: a post-policy era where words are theater and hypocrisy barely stings.
Prescriptions you can actually use:
• Before you post, ask: am I confessing, performing, or connecting?
• Use a 24-hour rule on anything personal or inflammatory.
• Write down your values and hold yourself (and your leaders) to them at the ballot box.
Also featuring Crow 86 in a plastic bottle, Horse Soldier for contrast, and the required roast of pajama pants in public.
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Shrink The Nation is where America lies on the couch — and we pour the bourbon.
Hosted by board-certified psychiatrists and mental health pros with backgrounds in military, media, and systems thinking, we break down the psychology behind politics, culture, and public dysfunction.
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Shrink The Nation — On the Couch With America.