'In war, there's also the psychological struggle of parents who can't provide safety'
Jan 13, 2025
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Karen Zivan, a psychologist and mother of five IDF soldiers, discusses the profound psychological toll of war on Israeli families. She highlights the emotional chaos following the October 7th attacks and the urgent need for mental health support. Joining her, Nagham Zbeedat shares her insights on the dire humanitarian crisis in Gaza, particularly the struggles parents face in providing basic care for newborns amidst conflict. Both stress the unseen emotional battles parents endure when safety for their children becomes elusive.
Karen Zivan discusses the psychological burden on Israeli families coping with loved ones in the military amid ongoing conflict.
Nagham Zbeedat highlights the humanitarian crisis in Gaza, focusing on the struggles of parents to provide basic needs for their infants.
Deep dives
The Psychological Impact of War on Families
The discussion highlights how the ongoing conflict has profoundly affected families in Israel, particularly those with members serving in the military. Karen Zyvan shares her personal experiences as a mother of five sons in the IDF, illustrating the chaos and fear families experience as they navigate their loved ones' participation in the war. Many families communicate in a flurry of messages, seeking reassurance and information, while simultaneously managing their own anxiety and that of their children. The emotional toll extends beyond immediate family, affecting the broader community as families come together to support each other through nonverbal connections like hugs, highlighting the human need for comfort in times of crisis.
Coping Mechanisms Amidst the Chaos
Zyvan emphasizes the importance of coping strategies for families dealing with the stress and fear of war, noting a shift from individualistic approaches to seeking emotional support collectively. As people share their feelings more openly, there is a growing recognition of the necessity to address emotions rather than simply returning to routine activities. This willingness to confront emotions allows individuals and communities to better understand their experiences and support each other through shared struggles. The dialogue reflects a broader cultural shift in Israeli society, moving from a focus on functioning through duty to fostering genuine emotional connections.
The Humanitarian Crisis in Gaza
The podcast also discusses the humanitarian crisis in Gaza, particularly focusing on the challenges faced by young families and infants. The dire lack of basic necessities, such as clean water and diapers, highlights the severe reality that parents must navigate in a war-torn environment. As families struggle to care for their newborns amidst ongoing violence and resource shortages, their emotional and psychological burdens are compounded. This situation illustrates not only the immediate physical needs of those in Gaza but also the broader implications of the conflict on mental health and societal stability.
Israelis have long prided themselves on their ability to face war and conflict with strength and resilience. But the tragedy of October 7, and the ongoing war in Gaza and attacks by Iranian proxies have challenged this ethos, says Karen Zivan, a psychologist who works in schools alongside her private practice, and the mother of five sons who have served in reserve duty during the current war.
On the podcast, Zivan talks to host Allison Kaplan Sommer about the different ways the war has taken its toll on the Israeli psyche, and how mental health professionals are coping with the enormous well of need.
Haaretz correspondent Nagham Zbeedat also joins the podcast to discuss her coverage of the worsening humanitarian crisis in Gaza, and specifically her recent article on the inability of parents of newborn babies to meet basic needs.
"When the war broke out, it was declared that Israel was going to war against Hamas and those who praise Hamas," Zbeedat said, explaining her decision to focus on the issue. "But babies had no control. Children and women are most affected by the war and they have absolutely no control... War isn't just about bombs and airstrikes, but also the psychological struggle that parents go through knowing that they can't provide a secure and safe environment for their children."