S3E17 - Why Your Child Fights for Control — and How to Respond

In this episode of the Parent Companion for Play Therapy series, I talk about how many challenging behaviors in young children can be traced back to one core issue: power and control. Melanie wrote in with concerns about her two-and-a-half-year-old nephew — picky eating, tantrums, saying "no" to everything, refusing to follow directions, and melting down when overwhelmed. I walk through how each of these behaviors connects to a child's need to feel some sense of control in their world, especially when so much of daily life is directed by adults.

I also explain why giving in during big outbursts reinforces the escalation cycle, how choices help empower kids in healthy ways, why neutrality matters when setting limits, and how reflecting feelings helps children feel understood even in difficult moments. These principles help reduce power struggles and create a calmer, more connected relationship — even when behaviors feel overwhelming.

Ask Me Questions: Call ‪(813) 812-5525‬, or email: brenna@thekidcounselor.com My Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids - https://a.co/d/bThnKH9 Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/ My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/ My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/

Common References: Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge. Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.