If dependency is not a bad word, nobody told Michelle and me. Since we were children our mom has implanted us with the mantras: “You must be independent”, “Never depend on a man”, etc.

Immigration to the United States of America probably self-selects for the most independent-minded people and we were brought up in an entire family of freedom lovers.

Independence has served us well. We were eager to start working and provide for ourselves. We were eager to learn about financial independence. Did someone say we could be free from even outside sources of income? Count us in.

So what’s the only problem with independence? The fact that none of us are truly independent. We rely on others for social support, mentoring, financial security, diverse perspectives, new ideas, inspiration, and more.

In the book Attached, the authors discuss how depending on another person like a romantic person can provide security that can allow for more creativity and adventure. Ironically, the sense of safety that comes from relationships provides us with more freedom in our lives.

This week Michelle and I discuss how dependence can be beneficial and how actions like being vulnerable and expressing your needs can help create a mutualistic relationship.

Show Notes:

Attached by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller

Community Time

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E127: Julie Symons - "Having Fun With Obedience"