The Baggage Reclaim Sessions Ep. 214: We Don't Need To Put So Much Bandwidth Into Keeping Up Appearances
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Feb 26, 2021 Natalie delves into the pressures of keeping up appearances and how societal norms distort our self-image. She explores the emotional toll of pretending to be perfect and how this affects our relationships. The discussion highlights the impact of various biases and family expectations on our authenticity. As people age, they often grow weary of maintaining façades. Natalie encourages listeners to invest their energy in being true to themselves and prioritizing genuine connections over curated images.
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Bandwidth Spent On Illusions
- We spend huge amounts of bandwidth creating the impression that things are more OK than they are.
- Most things we hide are not actually 'bad' but reflections of internalized social rules and stigma.
Shame Is Socially Engineered
- Shame and internalized 'isms' drive much of our need to appear acceptable.
- These messages dictate who counts as an 'okay' person or family and push people into hiding parts of themselves.
Wedding Row Exposed Family Illusions
- Natalie recounts a family fallout before her wedding over who would walk her down the aisle.
- The dispute revealed long-hidden wounds and how fragile relationships can be beneath appearances.
