Insider tips on how to take the perfect penalty? We got ‘em. Genuinely fascinating insights from a man with a better record than many others. Troy Deeney was Watford’s talisman and striker for years, and now is on our screens as pundit with the main sports broadcasters.

He’s got a fascinating life story to tell involving some pretty hard stories about his upbringing, a stint in prison and how he’s kept himself together through it all.

OH, and one thing that’s worth mentioning… There’s a description of footballer’s toenails about a third of the way through. If you’re a little squeamish then give that a forward scrub. Footballers have the mankiest toenails. Yeurch.

⚽️ Troy has setup Vision Football Factory in Tamworth – it plays an important role in the Birmingham area, providing a safe & quality space for young people to play football & build community. The website is www.visionfootballfactory.com and you can find them on Instagram at @visionfootballfactory

You can also catch Troy on various broadcast platforms covering football, and finally you could follow Troy on Instagram to see everything he’s up to - his handle is @t_deeney. ⚽️

Russell is out on the road also, with dates across the world. He’s zipping around with such ferocity that I couldn’t possibly pinpoint where on the planet he’ll be when you read this. Stay up to date at russell-howard.co.uk - which is also where you can stream Russell’s latest smash hit hour-long special. It’s not been long out and it’s bloody good.

If you’d like to get the podcast without being interrupted by adverts, and get an extra show every week, AND get it all a day before everyone else, then you can! You can join our Patreon for less than the cost of a pint of beer a month (or maybe two pints of orange juice if you’re not a booze hound).

Click this link to join or find out more:

patreon.com/RussellHoward

There we go. That’s this week’s missive.

Thanks for being part of all this because really if you didn’t read this then it wouldn’t be worth writing.

Only joking. I know there’s nobody reading this far down.

It’s just me, alone with my thoughts, spurting out nonsense that nobody will ever see. I could say anything. I could say all the cancellable stuff.

Obviously I won’t because I’m nothing if not a coward. I don’t really want to be up on a work tribunal explaining why I wrote awful things in a podcast notes sign-off. That’s no way to lose it all.

I’ll stick to aimless rambling in the wind.

See you later, nobody.

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Vixen Panda, NPM, Roundcube, IoT, 4Chan, Josh Marpet, and more... - SWN #484